Subject: RECONFIRM.Ellie Borden
Date: 5/6/2005
From: "ben uba" <benuba5000@rediffmail.com>
FROM THE DESK OF BEN UBA(Ph.d).
SENIOR ACCOUNTANT,LION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC
34 AHMADU BELLO WAY JOS NIGERIA
I am a senior Accountant in my Bank and Accounting officer to Mr.Arthur Borden,who worked as an expatriate well Engineer with Elf petroleum (Nigeria) Ltd. On the 21st of April 2002, my customer, his wife and their two children were involved in auto-crash along the ever busy Sagumu-Ibadan High Way. All occupants of the vehicle unfortunately lost their lives.
Since then,the Board of Directors of my Bank have made several enquires to their embassy to locate any of my customer's extended relations but to no avail.
I have contacted you to assist in repatriating the money and Property left behind by my client before they get Confiscated or declared unserviceable by the bank where this Huge deposits of USD$10M was lodged.
The Bank has published several Notice for the Next of Kin of the deceased to apply for collection of this Funds or have the account confiscated within a shot Period of time.
Since I have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over 2 years now I seek your consent to present you as the Next of kin of the deceased, so that the proceeds of this Account valued at US$10 million dollars can be paid to you and Then you and me can share the money,60% to me and 40% to you.
I have all necessary legal documents that can be used to backup any claim we may make. All I require is your honest cooperation to enable this deal through.I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate Arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the Law.
Please get in touch with me via my email and send to me your Telephone and fax numbers to enable us further about this Transaction.
Best regards,
BEN UBA,
SENIOR ACCOUNTANT
LION BANK.
[That was your basic Dead Bank Customer Letter.]
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/6/2005
To: benuba5000@rediffmail.com
Mr. Uba,
I never even knew I had a relative named Arthur. This is amazing. I do have a question though, why would I split this money with you 40/60? I suppose I should be grateful for your bringing this inheritance to my attention, but this offer of splitting it in this manner seems inappropriate to me.
Don't you think that it would be more appropriate that we do a 90/10? I would think this would be a more than generous reward for bringing this inheritance to my attention. And I certainly do appreciate your bringing this to my attention.
Please tell me, what is the next step I should take? Do I contact the bank directly and ask for the money?
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Subject: URGENT REPLY/MY PASSPORT
Date: 5/7/2005
From: "ben uba" <benuba5000@rediffmail.com>
Attachment: Passport.jpg
Dear Lizzie,
Thank you very much for your reply and i was realy flattered.I decided to make it 40/60 because of what it has cost me to get you and considering the fact that you might loose everything if i had not contacted you.
Anyway,maybe we should leave how it should be shared for now and work towards successful transfer of the fund after which you will invite me to your country so i can have my own share of it but you must assure me that you will not disappear when it gets to you.
As for what you are to do next,i would like you to reply as soon as you can and inform me if you can come down to Nigeria and apply for the immediate transfer of the fund or if you would prefer the services of an attorney who will do it on your behalf so i can get you one.
Meanwhile i attached a copy of my passport and would like you to attach yours too in your next mail.(Please if you did not recieve my passport let me know so i can send it again)
THANKS.
BEN UBA.
See the attached image Ben Uba.jpg
[Faces have been censored to protect the probably-innocent -- never send a copy of your passport, driver's license or anything to a scammer! It may live on as a scammer's fake ID. Also scammers like to use pictures from magazines.]
Ive seen worse, but not much. This fake passport does not impress.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/8/2005
Sure, I would be happy to send you my passport, but I still don't think a 40/60 split is appropriate. I certainly appreciate all you have done by bringing this to my attention, but a million dollars seems more than adequate for you. Why should I be sharing such a large percentage of the money with you for simply doing your job?
I think a 10% cut is more than enough.
Lizzie
See attached image Lizzie Borden Passport.jpg
On the other hand, this passport looks pretty good. There are some very clear defects in it if you know what to look for, and it would not fool anyone but a scammer from Lagos
Ben Uba
Date: 5/9/2005
Dear Lizzie,
Thank you very much for your reply and for sending me your passport.I also wish to let you know you that if 10% is what you feel you can give to me,then i will be happy to have it as long as you keep your word.
Meanwhile you have not told me if you would want to come down to Nigeria and apply for the immediate tramsfer of the fund yourself or if you would prefer the services of an attorney?Please let me know the one you prefer as soon as possible.
THANKS.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/9/2005
Ben,
I guess I don't quite understand. What is the requirement to come to Nigeria? Are there documents that need to be signed? If so, can't I sign them by fax?
I can come to Nigeria if needed, but it is fairly expensive to make such a trip. What do you recommend?
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Subject: CONTACT HIM
Date: 5/10/2005
From: "ben uba" <benuba5000@rediffmail.com>
Dear Lizzie,
There are documents that will definately need to be signed but am sure the attorney will know the best way to do it if you decide to hire one.That will be between the two of you and since you have already complained about expenses, i will advice you to get an attorney here and if evetualy you are asked to come,then you can make arrangement for that because if you come now,you will still require the services of an attorney.
Based on that,i have already make some enquiries and got the contact informations of a very good and well known attorney here in Nigeria and who is also a Senior Advocate of Nigeria(SAN) Below is his name and contact informations;
BARRISTER DAN EZE (SAN)
PRINCIPAL ATTORNEY
DAN EZE AND ASSOCIATES
4 FOLA JINADU CRESCENT
GABAGADA, LAGOS NIGERIA
Phone..+234-8023815879
Email...daneze_chamber@yahoo.com
Please if you are not sure of what to tell him,then copy the message below and send it to him and also try as much as you can to call him on his phone.I was informed that the number is his direct moblie number.Below is the message.
SIR,
I AM ELIZABETH CARMEN BORDEN. I AM A NATIVE OF UNITED STATES.I AM THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE LATE ARTHUR BORDEN WHO DIED IN 21st of April 2002. I AM ENTITLED TO HIS ESTATE ACCOUNT OF US $10M WITH LION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC AND I WANT YOU TO REPRESENT ME AS MY LEGAL ADVISER IN THE CLAIMS PROCESSING OF THE FUNDS WITH LION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC
I WANT TO ENQUIRE YOUR TERMS OF SERVICE TO ENABLE ME ENGAGE YOUR COMPETENT LEGAL SERVICES. I AWAIT YOUR URGENT INFORMATION.
ELIZABETH BORDEN.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/10/2005
Ben,
So are you suggesting I come to Nigeria? For this amount of money, it might actually be appropriate for me to come and take care of this in person.
If I did come, where would I need to go? Would I contact you when I arrived?
By the way, I attempted to call you through the Lion Bank phone number, but I get a statement in another language and then the call does not go through. It is as if the line is disconnected. The "Outside area" number listed on the web site also does not go through at all.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Subject: PLEASE JUST CONTACT HIM FIRST.
Date: 5/11/2005
Dear lizzie,
I will advice you to get the services of an attorney first because he will be the one to let you know if you will need to come to Nigeria or not.Why i insist you get the services of an attorney as soon as possible is to get the transfer proccess started as the bank might want to confiscate the account if they are not notified of any next of kin to the deceased very soon.
Actualy my intention was to let you know about your uncle's fund and then leave you to do the transfer proccess but because you have asked for my opinion,the best thing to do first is for you to contact an attorney and i have even gone as far as getting you one,that should be enough to get you started.Do that immediately and let's see what he says.
Remember that i am going against the bank's rules by telling you all these and that means that i must not participate openly in this transaction and that is why you need an attorney that you can confide in,and who will tell you how best to go about this.
BEN UBA.
The following message bounced, the email address was not valid. Ellie Borden
Subject: Query
Date: 5/11/2005
To: daneze_chamber@yahoo.com
SIR,
I AM ELIZABETH BORDEN. I AM A NATIVE OF UNITED STATES.v
I WAS REFERRED TO YOU BY BEN UBA.
I AM THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE LATE ARTHUR BORDEN WHO DIED IN 21st of April 2002. HE APPARENTLY LEFT SOME MONEY AFTER HIS SUDDEN AND GHASTLY DEATH, AND I WOULD LIKE TO RETRIEVE IT.
I AM NOT SURE THAT I NEED A LAWYER TO CONDUCT THIS TRANSACTION, BUT MR. UBA BELIEVES IT WOULD BE IN OUR BEST INTEREST.
ELIZABETH BORDEN.
Ellie Borden
. Date: 5/11/2005
Ben,
I just wrote him, and the email immediately bounced. This does not inspire confidence in the man or the process.
Normally, bank transfers are simple, and I do not see why we would need to involve a third party. I should be able to simply contact the bank and make the transfer in to a local account, right?
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Subject: I MISTYPED THE EMAIL ADDRESS
Date: 5/12/2005
My good friend this is not like every other bank transaction because you will need to apply for the transfer of the fund as a next of kin and there will documents that will need to be provided which only the attorney will do for you.
Remember,the real owner of the account is late and for the fund to be successfuly transferred to your local account,there has to be a proccess,i am banker and a staff of the bank in question,and that means that i should know how the transaction here works.Please follow up as i have adviced you so we can get this whole thing done as soon as possible.
I went through the contact email and realised that there was a mistake from my side,the email address is daneze_chambers@yahoo.com(and not daneze_chamber@yahoo.com)
Please do not say that there is lack of confidence in this transaction simply becuse i made a little mistake which is normal as anyone can even mistype his own name.Also you should have called him when you realised that the mail could no go.
THANKS.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/12/2005
To: daneze_chambers@yahoo.com
SIR,
I AM ELIZABETH BORDEN. I AM A NATIVE OF UNITED STATES.
I WAS REFERRED TO YOU BY BEN UBA.
I AM THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE LATE ARTHUR BORDEN WHO DIED IN 21st of April 2002. HE APPARENTLY LEFT SOME MONEY AFTER HIS SUDDEN AND GHASTLY DEATH, AND I WOULD LIKE TO RETRIEVE IT.
I AM NOT SURE THAT I NEED A LAWYER TO CONDUCT THIS TRANSACTION, BUT MR. UBA BELIEVES IT WOULD BE IN OUR BEST INTEREST.
ELIZABETH BORDEN.
I found the following letter somewhat confusing, and didnt spend the time trying to decipher it. You would think that if scamming people were your business, you would get your materials lined up a little better.
Dan Eze
Subject: RE: Query
Date: 5/13/2005
From: dan eze <daneze_chambers@yahoo.com>
ATTENTION:
UPON MY RECIEPT OF YOUR MAIL, IT ISMY PLEASURE TO HELP YOU CARRY OUT YOUR LEGAL WORK AS A RESULT OF WHICH I WENT TO THE NEAREST BRANCH OF THE BANK TO FIND OUT IF YOUR CLAIMS WERE REAL AND I GOT A POSITIVE ANSWER.
HOWEVER,THERE WERE SOME QUESTIONS THAT I WAS ASKED WHICH I COULD NOT PROVIDE THE ANSWERS AND FOR THAT REASON,I WANT YOU TO SEND ME THE ACCOUNT NUMBER AND THE SECRETE QUESTION AND ANSWER TO PROVE TO ME THAT YOU ARE THE NEXT OF KIN TO LATE ARTHUR BORDEN.
I ALSO WENT FURTHER TO ENQUIRE WHAT IT WILL TAKE TO GET THE MONEY TRANSFERRED TO YOU AS YOU WISH AND I WAS ASKED TO PROVIDE SOME DOCUMENTS WHICH MUST BE AVAILABLE BEFORE THE TRANSFER PROCCESS CAN BEGIN.I WAS ALSOTOLD IT HAS TO BE SO DUE TO THE FACT THAT ARTHUR BORDEN IS LATE AND SO IT WILL NOT BE A DIRECT TRANSFER FROM THE HIM WHICH WOULD HAVE BEEN EASIER THAN YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN. BELOW ARE THE DOCUMENTS AND THE COST OF GETTING EACH OF THEM:
1.POLICE REPORT ON THE DEATH..................$200.USD
2.ROAD SAFETY REPORT..........................$200.USD
3.DEATH CERTIFICATE.......................... $350.USD
4.AN AFFIDAVITT THAT YOU ARE THE NEXT OF KIN..$150.USD
TOTAL.........................................$900.USD
CONSEQUETNLY, I AM A MAN OF HIGH REPUTE AND I AM SURE THAT WAS THE REASON YOU WERE DIRECTED TO ME,MORE SO I WAS CALLED TO BAR IN 1977 AND HAVE WORKED WITH MANY CLIENTS FOR SUCCESS BOTH HOME AND ABROAD.
BELOW ARE THE REQUIREMENTS TO ENABLING ME GET THINGS STARTED AS REQUIRED: i..ADDRESS A LETTER TO MY CHAMBERS APPOINTING ME TO ACT AS YOUR ATTORNEY IN THE SUCCESSFUL TRANSFER OF YOUR MONEY.
ii..INDICATE IN YOUR LETTER THAT MY ATTORNEY/LEGAL FEE OF $4600.usd IS ACCEPTED BY YOU AND YOU SHALL MOBILISE ME WITH $1300.usd AND THE BALANCE WILL BE PAID UPON THE SUCCESSFUL TRANSFER OF YOUR MONEY AND YOU WILL ALSO PAY UPFRONT REQUIRED AMOUNT OF $900.usd FOR THE PROCUREMENT OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED DOCUMENTS FROM THE VARIOUS FEDERAL AGENCIES.WHICH PUTS THE TOTAL MONEY TO $2,200.usd.
CALL ME ON MY DIRECT NUMBER FO BETTER COMMUNICATION.+234-8023815879
DAN EZE.
At this point, I just had too many other conversations going on with other scammers, and simply forgot to respond to the lads for a while. They had to prompt me.
Ben Uba
. Date: 5/14/2005
Dear lizzie,
How are you today?For sometime now you have not written me,hope everything is fine?Have you contacted the attorney and if yes,what was the outcome of your discussion with him?
Ben Uba
Date: 5/16/2005
Dear Lizzie,
Please email me and update me in the latest developemt.Or are you trying to finish up without me?That will not fair.
BEN UBA.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/16/2005
No Ben,
I would never try to cheat you or finish up without you. The lawyer has requested a large sum of money from me, and I was somewhat taken aback and was considering how to handle this.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 5/16/2005
Thank you for your mail.Please let me know what exactly he said and homuch he requested from you.You see,why i asked you to get the services of a lawyer is because of the constitution here,for situations like this,there are documents that will be requested from you and even if you come down here,you will still get an attorney before you can get the documents.
Meanwhile,you should try as much as you can to meet up with whatever he demands because from my understanding here as a staff of this bank,you might not need to come here if the attorney does his works well,all will be required of you will be your bank account where the fund will transferred into,that is after the attorney has met with the bank's conditions on your behalf.And did you have an oral discussion or did you just sent him and email?If you did not call him please try and do so as that will give you an opportunity to explain to him how serious you are.I expect to hear from you soon.
BEN UBA.
Ben Uba
Date: 5/17/2005
Dear Lizzie,
How are you today?Am still very worried as i have not heard from you.As i said ealier,i would like you to let me know exactly what the attorney said and the amount he requested from you to see if there is anyway i can help.
Right about here, I lose track and Lizzie becomes an older, retired woman. The lads dont seem to notice right away.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/17/2005
Dear Benuba,
This has been on my mind very much. I am retired, and not as sprightly as I was in my youth. I live on social security, and the amount of money the lawyer is requesting is really most of my savings. I know that I would get a lot of money in return, but I just don't know if I can afford this.
Lizzie
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/17/2005
I am sorry I did not explain how much the lawyer was asking for. I do not really understand all the numbers he wrote me, but it looks like he wants $10,800.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 5/18/2005
Dear Lizzie,
I am not happy with way you are taking this wholething.If you did not understand the figures as you said,what then stoped you from getting back to him so he can explain things to you?Also i am not sure of what you are saying,i mean what does he need all that money for,try and forward tha mail to me and let me read it myself.
Remember we need to be very fast with whatever we are doing.Make sure you forward the mail to me and also get back to the attorney and ask him to explain everything to you.We cannot pullout now that he has made it known to bank that you are about to get the fund transferred to you.
Ben Uba
Subject: VERY URGENT MESSAGE AND REPLY.
Date: 5/18/2005
Dear Lizzie,
There was a management meeting this morning in our bank and your issue was raised.I was called upon as the personal accountant to the deceased to provide some informations on his transactions with us.
The director of International Remmittance Department made it opened that if the attorney does not get back to the bank in few days,the bank will confiscate the account,this is because the attorney has not gotten back since the first day he came to notify the bank that you intend to get the money transferred to you and for that the reason, the management is suspecting a fowl play.
Then the attorney was asked to provide some information which will proove to the bank that you are the real next of kin to our late client and am sure he does not have those informations and he will definately ask you to provide them.I do not know if he has asked you for any informations but if he has and you do not have it,there is nothing to worry about because i will put down every information about your late uncle's account below,i am doing all these because i do not want any delay in this transaction and please try and work closely with the attorney,see him as a friend so he can get the best result for you.
Here are the informations:
THE ACCOUNT NUMBERS ARE 0140317075500.
THE ACCOUNT NAME IS ARTHUR BORDEN.
ACCOUNT TYPE IS FIXED DEPOSIT.
THE DATE OF DEPOSIT IS DECEMBER, 2000.
THE ACCOUNT VALUE IS US$10M.
THE SECRET CODE TO THE ACCOUNT IS "HOW OLD IS YOUR DAUGHTER?" AND THE ANSWER IS "SHE IS EVER YOUNG".
These informations that i have just given you are very delicate and must be kept secrete because any other person that has access to them can easily claim the money.Do not forget to forward the attorney's email to me so i can read his mail myself and see if you misunderstood something because i do not see any reason why he should demand $10,800.usd from.And always reply to messages fast enough.
BEN UBA.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/18/2005
To: daneze_chambers@yahoo.com
Mr. Daneze,
I really don't understand your charges. It appears you want over $10,000 to type up some simple documents. I can not afford this, as I live on a social security pension.
Can you please explain why these things are so expensive, and is there any way that we can reduce or remove this expense?
Mr. Benuba from the bank has provided me with some information that you may need, and it might make the whole transaction easier and cheaper. Does this information help?
Lizzie
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/18/2005
To: daneze_chambers@yahoo.com
Cc: benuba5000@rediffmail.com
Mr. benuba,
OK, I sent an email to the lawyer asking for more explanation and if there was any way to reduce the charges. So, maybe the information you provided will help.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 5/19/2005
Dear Lizzie,
Thank you for your reply and i have read the mail you forwarded to me.Please the attorney is asking for a total fee of $2,200.usd(not $10,800.usd as you told me)
The fund i unerstand is for the documents the bank asked him to provide and for an advance payment for his services because i read where he said that the balance for his legal fee will be made after the successful transfer of your money.
I think he is fair enough in services and please once again,the total money you are to send to him is $2,200.usd and not the amount you told me.
Let me leak a secrete to you,the management has asked me to do all neccessary documentation on the late client as soon as possible because the bank intends to get your money transferred to you as soon as possible but it all depends on how fast the attorney is in responses to the bank.This is because the bank is trying to boost it's working relations on the internation level.So try and do whatever you are doing with the attorney fast enough.
BEN UBA.
Dan Eze
Subject: THE AMOUNT IS $2,200 USD and not OVE TEN $10,000USD
Date: 5/19/2005
ATT.
IT IS QUITE SURPRISING THAT YOU MISUNDERTOOD MY MAIL WHICH I AM SURE DELAYED YOUR REPLY AND ALSO DELAYED MY MEETING WITH THE BANK'S MANAGEMENT AS A RESULT OF WHICH THEY GAVE ME A CALL TODAY ASKING IF YOU HAVE CHANGED YOUR MIND OVER THE TRANSFER OF YOUR MONEY.
HOWEVER,I DID NOT ASK YOU TO PAY ME OVER $10,00USD.AS YOU ACCUSED ME RATHER I ASKED YOU TO PAY ME $2,200 USD.
I WENT FURTHER TO EXPLAIN TO YOU THAT THE MONEY IS FOR THE PROCUREMENT OF THE DOCUMENTS WHICH THE BANK ASKED ME TO PROVIDE,IT MIGHT INTEREST YOU TO KNOW THAT I WILL NEED TO GET TO THE VARIOUS HEADQUATERS OF THE FEDERAL AGENCIES WHERE I AM TO GET THOSE DOCUMENTS FROM.I AM NOT THE ONE TO TYPE OR PRODUCE THEM.SO THE DOCUMENTS WILL COST ME $900.USD.ALSO YOU ARE TO PAY ME AN ADVANCE LEGAL FEE OF $1,300.usd.THAT PUTS THE TOTAL MONEY TO $2,200 USD.
PLEASE I WILL LIKE YOU TO SEND THE MONEY IMMEDIATELY YOU READ THIS MAIL BECUASE THE BANK HAS ASKED ME TO GET BACK TO THEM IIMEDIATELY AND I CANNOT GET BACK TO THEM WITHOUT THE DOCUMENTS THEY ASKED ME TO PROVIDE WHISH IS WHY YOU NEED TO SEND ME THE MONEY SOON SO I CAN GET THE DOCUMENTS.
YOU ARE TO SEND THE MONEY TO MY SECRETARY'S NAME VIA WESTERN UNION AS HE WILL BE THE ONE TO CASH IT FROM THE BANK BECAUSE I WILL NOT HAVE THE TIME TO DO THAT.BELOW IS HIS NAME AND ADDRESS WHICH YOU ARE TO USE IN THE TRANSFER DATA:
DEDE CHIMA A.
26 ALHAJI IDOWU STREET
PEDRO,LAGOS.
NIGERIA.
v DO NOT FORGET TO SEND ME THE TRANSFER DATA SUCH AS:
TEXT QUESTION AND ANSWER.
CONTROL NUMBER.
SENDER'S NAME AND ADDRESS.
BECAUSE WITHOUT THEM,WE CANNOT CASH THE MONEY HERE.LET ME PROMISE YOU HERE THAT IF THINGS WORK WELL,THE MONEY SHOULD BE IN YOUR POSSESSION WITHIN THE NEXT 10 WORKING DAYS.
FINALY,AFTER YOU HAVE SENT THE MONEY TO ME VIA WESTERN UNION,SEND ME YOUR BANK'S NAME AND ACCOUNT NUMBER WHERE YOU WILL NEED THE MONEY TO BE TRANSFERRED INTO.SEND IT ALONG WITH THE TRANSFER DATA.
ONCE AGAIN,TO AVOID ANOTHER MISUNDERSTANDING,YOU ARE TO SEND ME $2,200 USD VIA WESTERN UNION IMMEDIATELY YOU READ THIS MAIL.
DAN EZE.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/19/2005
Mr. Daneze,
You are SHOUTING. There is no need to SHOUT. Please do not SHOUT anymore.
I did not ACCUSE you of asking for $10,800, I added all the fees you spoke of in your email and it TOTALED $10,800. It did NOT total $2,200. If you are going to change your fee to $2,200, that's great. It still doesn't explain why it costs so much to type up some documents. If you send me the text, I will type them myself. I used to be a very good typist; in fact I was a secretary for some part of my early career before specializing in patricide.
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Subject: STOP INSULTING ME.
Date: 5/20/2005
ATTN.
I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY ALL THESE INSULTS.AND PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO GO THROUGH MY MAIL AGAIN AND TELL ME HOW IT AMOUNTED TO OVER $10,000.I NEVER REDUCED ANYTHING AND ALSO I HAVE TOLD YOU THAT I AM NOT TO RPODUCE ANY OF THESE DOCUMENTS,IF DOUBT ME,COME OVER TO MY COUNTRY AND APPLY OR THEM YOURSELF AND SEE IF IT WILL COST YOU LESS?
I WILL NEED TO GO TO HEADQUATERS OF FEDERAL ROAD SAFETY TO GET THE ROAD SAFETY REPORT..........................$200.USD
I WILL ALSO GO TO THE HEADQUATERS OF FEDERAL POLICE TO GET THE POLICE REPORT ON THE DEATH..................$200.USD
THESAME APPLIES FOR THE DEATH CERTIFICATE.......................... $350.USD AND AN AFFIDAVITT THAT YOU ARE THE NEXT OF KIN..$150.USD.
NOW PUT ALL THESE FIGURES TOGETHER AND TELL ME HOWCOME IT AMOUNTED TO OVER $10,000 USD.
$200+$200+350+$150...THAT SHOULD BE $900.THEN ADD THE ADVANCE PAYMENT OF MY LEGAL FEE WHICH IS $1,300 AND TELL ME THE TOTAL.(OCOURSE THAT IS $2,200 USD) I REALY DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE SO RUDE?BUT THAT IS NOT THE BEST APPROACH TO THIS,I WILL ADVICE YOU MAKE THE PAYMENT AS SOON AS YOU CAN BECAUSE THE EARLIER THE BETTER FOR THIS TRANSACTION.I HAVE TRIED ALL I CAN,THE AMOUNT I STATED FOR THE DOCUMENTS IS WHAT THE VARIOUS AGENCIES HAVE ASKED FOR THEM,I DID NOT ADD ANYTHING.AND WHY HAVE YOU FOUND IT VERY DIFFICULT TO CALL BECAUSE I AM BEGINING TO THINK THAT YOU COULD BE THE WRONG NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED AND ALSO I DO NOT LIKE THIS IDEA IF EMAIL,IT DOES NOT PROVIDE THE RIGHT ENVIRONMENT FOR DISCUSSION,CALL ME AND AKS ME WHATEVER YOU WANT ON THE PHONE.AGAIN,MY PHONE NUMBER IS+234-802-381-5879.
DAN EZE.
Ben Uba
Date: 5/20/2005
Dear Lizzie,
I have not heard from you,have you asked the attorney why he asked you to pay over $10,800.usd?But i still think he asked for $2,200.usd,and not the amount you stated because the figures are very clear to calculate and i do not even know how you arrived at that amount.I have to be very frank with you,the fee is fine and going through the mail you forwarded to me,i realy agree with his decision.
Please i would like you to reach an agreement with him as soon as possible because i want the money to be in your account before the end of next week.The bank is still expecting to hear from him.
BEN UBA.
Dan Eze
Subject: PLEASE CALL ME
Date: 5/20/2005
From: dan eze <daneze_chambers@yahoo.com>
ATTN:
Please am very sorry if i got you angry but you are realy getting the whole situation wrong,go through the figures again and tell me how you got that $10,800.
I have also told you before and i will tell you again,those figures are what the agencies where i am to get the documents from are requesting and the advance leagl fee that i am asking for is to enable me carry out my assingment because i will need to make a lot of journeys.The bank headquaters is located in the northern part of my country and my office is in the west and the flight cost from my office to the bank's headquaters is about $150.usd.
That isnot all,i will still travel to the headquaters of other agencies ad when you put all these together,you will find out that i have nothing left and to be fair enough in this transaction,i have asked that the balance of my legal fee be paid after i have done my job,that is when the fund is successfully transferred to yo are account.
Please try and understand me very well,i know how things work here,there is a great difference between our economy and yours and so do not compare things.And why i need you to make the payment as soon as you can is because the management of the bank has already started thinking that i am upto something else,probably i am claiming what does not belong to you.
Furthermore,you should be happy that finaly you are about getting your fund that has been out of reach for a very long time and that should be enough reason for you to hasten things up.
Finaly,try and call me and let's have an oral discussion or better still,give me your number and let me see if i can call you because i am not comfortable with this email conversation.Atleast that will give me the reception needed to explain things very well to you.I am realy happy working for you and i am also ready to make sure i get the job done succesfully for you but you have to start trusting and believe me so we can achieve the best result within the time possible.Once again,i am sorry if used some words that you do not like,i like respecting my clients somuch even if they insult me but your case baffles me because right from your very first mail,you have been so unhappy with me.
DAN EZE.
NB.GO THROUGH THE FIGURES AGAIN.
1.POLICE REPORT ON THE DEATH............................$200.USD
2.ROAD SAFETY REPORT..........................................$200.USD
3.DEATH CERTIFICATE..............................................$350.USD
4.AN AFFIDAVITT THAT YOU ARE THE NEXT OF KIN..$150.USD
5.ADVANCE LEGAL FEE..............................................$1300.usd
TOTAL?
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/20/2005
Mr. Daneze,
I simply do not understand your attitude. You are the one who was shouting at me, and accusing me. I have been so upset about this whole thing that I developed a migraine headache and have had to miss two whole knitting bee meetings, and stay in my apartment in the dark. You have made me very nervous and upset.
I don't see how I miscalculated, though I accept that you are only asking for $2,200 right now. Since you insisted in three separate emails that I explain how I arrived at the figure, here is an explanation.
From your original email:
POLICE REPORT ON THE DEATH $200.USD
ROAD SAFETY REPORT $200.USD
DEATH CERTIFICATE $350.USD
AN AFFIDAVITT THAT YOU ARE THE NEXT OF KIN $150.USD
TOTAL Fees $900.USD
Attorney Fees $4600
Mobilize Fee $1300
Upfront payment $900
Total money $2200
This is 200+200+350+150+900+4600+1300+900+2200 = 10,800.
I am very confused by this whole thing and I can't afford $10,800. I live on social security and don't have that kind of money. Even $2,200 is difficult for me.
You seem to be a person that is very easily angered and takes their anger out on others. I am very upset. My heart can not take this stress.
Lizzie
[Scam-o-note: dear non-American readers, a short reality check here: for your information, social security in the U.S.A. is a nice supplement to a retirement, but actually trying to live on it is very, very, very tough. It often forces choices between food and medicine and rent. The sidewalks do, however, go all the way up to the doors. But they are not paved with gold.]
Dan Eze
Subject: I AM VERY SORRY FOR WHAT I HAVE CASUED YOU
Date: 5/21/2005
ATTN:
Thank you very much for your reply and i am very sorry for what i have caused you,i am truely sorry,it was not intentional and i hope you are getting better?
You see, you did not read my mail very well or maybe i should say that you got it all wrong.You are to pay me $1,300 usd as an advance payment out of the $4600 for theAttourney Feesand then give me the balnace of $3,600 usd when your money has been successfuly transferred into your account.
Then add up the $1,300 usd to the $900.usd which i am to use for the procurement of the documents and that will give us $2,200 usd.And that is all i am sking you to pay me for now untill when your money is transferred then you can send me the balance of my attorney fees which will be $3,300.
That is, if you want to calulate it all,then it has to be like this:
POLICE REPORT ON THE DEATH $200.USD
ROAD SAFETY REPORT $200.USD
DEATH CERTIFICATE $350.USD
AN AFFIDAVITT THAT YOU ARE THE NEXT OF KIN $150.USD
Attourney Fees which $4600
Total.....$5,500.
But out of that $5,500usd, you are to pay me $2,200 usd for now and after your money has been transferred,you can then send me my balance of $3,300.
I hope this is clear now.Please now that we have settled this,i would like you to make the transfer as soon as you can so i can begin my assigment because i would like to get this job done within the shortest time available as i have somany other clients waiting for my attention.I will try and call you.
DAN EZE.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/22/2005
Mr. Daneze,
This email is almost as confusing as the first one, but I will accept that you want $2,200.
I think this will be OK, though I have to clear out my savings account. Can we please make this a fee for service bill, so that I pay after the services are rendered? I won't have to remove most of my savings that way.
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Subject: URGENT PLEASE
Date: 5/23/2005
ATTN:
My dear i do not understand why you are still confused?I called your house to explain to you oraly but you where not around to pick the phone and i had to talk to the answering machine.
The following is a table of the money i am asking you to pay.
ATTORNEY FEE.$4600.
DOCUMENTS....$ 900.
TOTAL........$5500.
Now,out of that total amount,i am asking you to send only $2.200 for now and after i have done my job,you will then send the balance of $3.300.
I think that is fair enough considering the amount of work i will do and all the stress i will go through in the course of this transaction.
I will still try and call you again and explain to you oraly but please you will need to send me the $2.200 today so i can begin my assignment.I realy do not know how else you want me to explain all these.
Please this will be the best i can do and i want you to understand my feelings too.Remember i said i would like you to have your money this week and try and send me your bank's name,address and account number where you want the money to be transferred.We cannot affod more delay.
Hope you had a fine weekend?
DAN EZE.
The Tale of the Worn Out Balls
Ellie BordenDate: 5/23/2005
Mr. Daneze,
Well, I may not understand everything, but I do understand that you want $2,200.
To be very frank, i have been dreading this. I can not get to the bank right now. Let me explain this embarrassing situation.
My walker has tennis balls attached to the front legs to keep from scratching the floor. These tennis balls have worn through, and are not working any more. The front entry way of the retirement home where I live has hardwood flooring, and they won't let me go across this floor without my balls. They always send me back. So, I need to find someplace to get new balls before I can leave to go arrange for the payment. But they don't sell balls in the garden shop here at the home, so I don't know how to get out of the home to buy new ones. Kind of a chicken and egg problem, if you know what I mean.
You can see why I am embarrassed by this...
So I am working on it. I thought of buying some balls on the internet, but they would take a couple of days to ship here. I may have to do that.
Lizzie
I did get your message on the message machine, but it was very, very hard to understand.
Dan Eze
Subject: PLEASE ACT FAST.
Date: 5/24/2005
From: dan eze <daneze_chambers@yahoo.com>
ATTN:
Please am not here for achild's play and if you do not wish to have your fund transferred to you then just let me know.I realy did not get your joke or story but what i want you to know is that,the earlier you make the payment the better for the both of us.
You said you called my phone and i did not answer it.When i woke up this morning i saw a missed call but i did not see your number.When next you want to call,try and observe the time differrence because i find it very difficult to pick my call when sleeping as i always come home very tired.
Finally,i wouild like to advise you to make the payment today because i want to get this wholething done this week.Do not forget to send your bank's name and address and account number where you want the fund to be trabsferred and send it along with the transfer data such as:
Sender's Name and Address.
Amount sent.
Control Number.
Text Question and Answer.(best sports?.....soccer)
Please do it today.I am trying my best to give you all the attention you need as my client.
DAN EZE.
Ben Uba
Date: 5/25/2005
Dear Lizzie,
The bank has not heard from the attorney and i have not heard from you too,is everything alright?Reply and let me know what is going on.
BEN UBA.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/25/2005
Mr. Benuba,
Sorry for leaving you out of the loop. I have not been well.
I have had serious problems with my balls, and the lawyer is being very rude and insulting. I don't think he understands how hard it is to be old. I am getting new balls and will be able to leave the retirement home (I hope tomorrow) to get to the bank and around town. But I have been resting in a dark room with ear muffs to help me recover from the stress of this whole transaction, dealing with rude foreign lawyers.
Bless you,
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Date: 5/25/2005
ATTN:
How are and your health condition,hope you are getting better?I called your house several times and you refused to pick your phone,and you have not replied my mail,what is the latest development,?Please i want you to email or call me and inform me when you will make the payment.
DAN EZE.
Ellie Borden
. Date: 5/25/2005
Mr. Daneze,
I do not understand you, what joke are you referring to? I did not make any joke. I don't understand why you are impatient with me, I am describing real problems that old people have that may not seem like much to you, but when you are old it is very difficult to get around and these little things are really painful.
I have ordered new balls, and they should arrive soon, and I will be able to leave the retirement home soon. Please be patient in the meantime and do not express anger. You have frustration because I did not answer my phone, but you did not answer your phone either. I am old and deaf, what is your excuse?
Lizzie
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/25/2005
I just checked my answering machine, and discovered four voice messages from you. You are very, very hard to understand. You have an accent of some sort, what is it?
The light is out on my answering machine, I discover. Another little piece of my life going down the tubes.
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Date: 5/26/2005
Dear Client,
Am so sorry with the way i expressed myself in the previous mails,it was just that a client of mine got me upset.You see, i was to attend a court case for my client but he supplied me false information about the case,he did nottell me the truth concerning the matter and when i got to the court room,i was very embarrassed,then on getting back to my office,i checked my email only to see your mail.
Pease forgive me and also one of the problems i am having is that the bank is realy waiting to hear from me and there is no way ican get back to them without meeting their requirements.
So once again am very sorry but try and make the payment as soon as you can as that will make my job easier.Take good care of your health and always pray and believe in God so HE can give you good and strong health condition.
DAN EZE.
The Tale of the Sticky Ear Muffs
Ellie BordenDate: 5/26/2005
Mr Daneze, dear,
You appear to be a very emotional fellow. You are going to have to watch that in your business dealings. This whole thing has had me with constant migraines for the past several days. I am actually using my ear muffs so much that I am afraid they are going to wear out. They have begun to take on a certain sticky quality they never had before that is rather disconcerting.
I received new balls today, and will get Harvey down the way to put them on for me. We should be able to get it on then. If Muriel is available, I will get her to take me to the bank as soon as I am mobile again.
Hang in there!
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 5/27/2005
Dear Lizzie,
Sorry about your health and please do not mind whatever the lawyer does,your concern should be to get your money transferred to you as soon as possible.
So have you made the payment?If no? then try as much as you can to do so.
bye
Dan Eze
Date: 5/28/2005
ATTN:
I am still expecting to hear from you or do you have any other reason for not meeting up especially now that you have gotten the balls?The earlier you make the payment,the better for you,as for me i will only carry out your assignment only if you make the payment.
DAN EZE.
The Tale of the Feral Cat
Ellie BordenDate: 5/29/2005
Mr. Daneze,
Yes, I have my new balls installed, and they are most satisfactory. If you ever need balls, I can recommend these to you.
I have just returned from the hospital. I did leave to go to the bank but had a little mishap.
Muriel and I had just made it over the shiny hardwood floor and through the front door of the home. As we crossed the old, grey sidewalk to Muriel's car, a marmalade colored feral cat ran out from the bushes and ran between my legs. It was being chased by a small grey marsupial of some sort, perhaps a possum. Muriel's walker caught in a crack of the sidewalk and we both went down in a tangle of arms and legs. It would have been funny if Muriel had not bruised her hip, and I landed on the possum with a sound somewhere between a squish and a grunt.
Muriel is still in the hospital. The possum is dead, and the feral cat is missing. Good riddance I say.
Well, of course, the upshot of the whole experience is that I was unable to get to the bank. I will have Maude take me on Monday.
Ben Uba
Date: 5/30/2005
I do not like what is happening to this transaction,if you know you are not ready to carry out this transfer of the fund, then let me know,i am begining to loose my temper.
Dan Eze
Date: 5/30/2005
ATTN:
I got your email and i hope yopu make the payment today (monday) as you promised because i want to get your job done as soon as pssible as it's giving me somuch headache.
Frankly speaking i do not even know if you are saying the truth about this whole payment or not?But let me give you the benefit of doubt.
DAN EZE.
Ben Uba
Date: 5/31/2005
I do not know why the attorney has not gotten back to the bank?Try and settle with him so he can get everything done.
Ellie Borden
Date: 5/30/2005
Mr. Danexe,
I can not make the payment today, it is a holiday. I suppose you don't know that, being a foreigner and all. The home is having a lovely dinner of roast ferret in pungent sauce with dimpled potatoes and mixed greens. But going out is not possible, most places are closed today anyway. I will be able to get out tomorrow.
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Subject: VERY URGENT
Date: 6/1/2005
ATTN:
Please send me the transfer data such as:
SENDER'S NAME AND ADDRESS.
AMOUNT SENT
CONTROL NUMBER
TEXT QUESTION AND ANSWER
So the money can cashed from the bank because without those informations my we cannot get the money from the bank.I hope you used the name i asked you to use.
DAN EZE.
Ben Uba
Date: 6/1/2005
Dear Lizzy,
It's been quite some time you emailed me,please if you have not made the payment to the attorney,try and so and when you,make sure you send me a copy of the transfer data for record purposes.
The transfer data as you may are..
CONTROL NUMBER
TEXTE QUESTION AND ANSWER
SENDER'S NAME AND ADDRESS
AMOUNT SENT.
BEN UBA.
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/1/2005
Mr. Danzel,
I don't understand. My name is Elizabeth Borden. Sometimes I go by Lizzie, but why would I use any other name. Can you please clarify? Perhaps it is the new little pills that my doctor told me to take, but this whole thing is beginning to turn in to a haze...
Lizzie
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/1/2005
Mr. Benbula,
Mr. Denzel asked for the same information, but he wanted me to use a different name... I don't understand, he never asked me to use a different name and I wouldn't do that anyway. I sent the money as Elizabeth Borden, and that is my name.
These little pills the doctor gave me make me go so slow. It is kind of a nice feeling, but it is a little hard to understand what people are saying some of the time...
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Date: 6/1/2005
ATTN:
Please do not make things difficult for me,you are the most sturbon client i have ever worked for.I did not ask you to use a different name to send the money,i only asked you the following questions which you filled when sending the money.
SENDER'S NAME( i already know)
AMOUNT SENT
CONTROL NUMBER
TEXT QUESTION AND ANSWER.
If you do not send the these informations, we will not be able to cash the money here in bank,try and understand this,it is very simple.
DAN EZE.
Ben Uba
Date: 6/1/2005
Dear Lizzy,
When you went to western union,am sure you were asked to fill some informations, such as the reciever's name and address.I want you to send me all the informations including the following;
CONTROL NUMBER
TEXTE QUESTION AND ANSWER
SENDER'S NAME AND ADDRESS
AMOUNT SENT.
Also send me the reciever's name and address,am sure there was a name an address where you were asked to the money.I want you to send me every information about that transfer for my record keeping.
I am begining to feel uncomfortable with you,am i sure you are real or some fake person? Anyway,reply immidiately.
BEN UBA
Dan Eze
Date: 6/2/2005
ATTN:
I need the transfer details because if i do not get them from you, my secretary will not be ablr to cash the money from the bank.
Please send me the following informations of the transfer:
SENDER'S ADDRESS
AMOUNT SENT
CONTROL NUMBER
TEXT QUESTION AND ANSWER.
Send them immediately,remember i asked you to send the money to following name and address:
DEDE CHIMA A.
26 ALHAJI IDOWU STREET
PEDRO,LAGOS.
NIGERIA.
They are my own information,now you send me your own information.I do not understand why you argue over everything?Everywhere in the world,once you make transfer through western union,you must send the transfer details to the reciever to enable him cash the money.
Please you are giving me somuch stress and trouble,if you do not wish to continue with this transaction,just let me know because i have better things to do with my time than to make unnneccessary arguement with one sturbon client.
DAN EZE.(SAN)
Well, he finally noticed that Lizzie transformed from a young woman in to an old lady. But he wont let that stop him!
Ben Uba
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: RE: Query
Date: 6/2/2005
This should not get you angry because DAN EZE has every right to aks you for the transfer data.I mean it's know that for every reciever to cash any money transferred to him via western union,the sender must send the transafer data to the reciever.
Now am only asking you send me all the informations for our record keeping,send me the name and address where he asked you to send the money to and also give me your own informations which you are surpose to also send to DAN EZE.
Do that as soon as possible.Once again,i must tell you that your arttitude is making me feel uncomfortable,as i refused to understand why all these delay in this transaction,you claim to be an old woman,but your passport says your born on 20th october 1977.
But that is not important for now,just get the informations over here so the transaction can go on.
BEN UBA.
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/2/2005
Mr. BENZULA,
Holy turtle droppings, how did that happen? Born in 1977? No way! I was born in 1937! Are you questioning my identity now? Oh dear.
But you said it was on my passport? How is that? I do not have a passport! Talk about stress.
How can you refuse to understand why there are all the delays in the transaction? I have kept you fully informed, and will continue to do so. I will email Mr. ZANEDE right away.
Lizzie
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/2/2005
Mr. Chambers,
My attitude is not in question here. You are the one getting upset and expressing frustration, anger, jealousy and rage. All these emotions lead down the path toward the dark side and are to be avoided. You must let go of all that you fear to lose. Only in this way can you be at peace.
Shame on you for making your secretary run errands like this. Treat her with more respect, pick up the money yourself!
I have no idea what you are talking about American Express. The money was sent from the bank, not on a credit card. The bank took care of the details of sending the money. They never gave me any of this control number or secret password stuff. I will give you the number of my bank, and perhaps you can call them to straighten this out: (212) 335-8900. Ask for Mr. Benjamin Dover, he was the nice man I used.
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Date: 6/3/2005
ATTN:v I asked you to send the money via western union and not bank.Go to any western union outlet in your area and send the money to the name and address that i will give you now.I am a very busy attorney and i will not have time to get to the western union outlet here to cash the money that is why will send my secretary. Below is the name and address where you are to send the money:
DEDE CHIMA A.
26 ALHAJI IDOWU STREET
PEDRO,LAGOS.
NIGERIA.
They send back Lizzies passport, which shows her age to be about 28.
Ben Uba
Date: 6/3/2005
Attachments: , eb passport.jpg
WHO HAS THIS PASSPORT?
Anyway,you have not given me the western union informations i asked you to provide?Or have you not sent the money to him?
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/3/2005
Why do you keep sending your messages twice?
And you are shouting, now, too.
I am very stressed and upset by all of this. I almost broke a hip when that feral cat tipped us over, and I have been working hard to satisfy you, but it appears there is just no satisfaction to be had in your life. You must be a very unhappy man.
The passport is my daughter's, as I explained before, I don't have one. Did you want to speak to her? We call her Beth. She no longer lives in this area, but with email, we keep in touch.
I have not been using my ear muffs recently, they were too sticky. But with all this stress, I think I will lock the door, turn out the lights and have a lie down with the muffs on anyway. Beth told me about this new kind of machine they have that sounds like water running when you turn it on. It is supposed to make you feel relaxed. I got one and it was most interesting, and was nice. But I found that I had to keep getting up to go to the bathroom, so I turned it off.
I don't know what you mean by western union, I don't bank at western union. I bank at Compass Savings.
Such anger in the world. Lagos must be a very unpleasant place.
Lizzie
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/3/2005
Mr. Danez,
All right.
I see now you are an anal retentive person who can not abide by deviations to your usual predefined way of doing things.
I will go to the bank and see if I can get the money back. Then I have to take it to a western union store and drop it off there. I am not used to traveling this much, but when it comes to working with someone with your psychological problems, I guess there is no choice.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 6/4/2005
I am not shouting but you are confusing me and i am a very happy man.It's just that i am not having the trust i shound have on you.You said the passport is your daughter's but that is the name you call yourself.
Anyway,let's leave that for now.You do not have to bank with western union before you can transfer money through them.Infact,Western Union is not a bank,it is specificaly made for easy and fast money transfer,all you need is to go there with the money you want to send and ask them to help you send it to the name and address that DAN EZE has given to you.That is all,there is now big deal here,the problem with you is that you never agreed you are at fault,you always want to be right but that is wrong.I am banker and i know what i am telling you, go to the nearest outlet of wetern union and send the money him
Please,for once take my advice and let's get this done.We cannot make progress with this your non-challant attitude,if you have been following up dilligently,the money must have been in your possession by now.
BEN UBA.
Dan Eze
Date: 6/4/2005
This is not something to get you angry,all you have to do is just to be humble and listen to me as your attorney who is working hard to make sure you have a success in your request to transfer your fund and there is noway i can achieve that without your full coperation which i am not getting from you. Western Union is an American institution specificaly made for fast and reliable money transfer.All you need is get to the nearest office in your arear with whatever amount you want to transfer and tell them that you want it sent to the name and address that i gave you.
I will recieve it within 24 hours after you have sent it and then i can go ahead and start your work.Why i am angry with the way you are behaving is because you have made me almost a false lawyer before the bank's management, it looks as if you are trying to claim what is not yours and remember that i am Senior Advocate of Nigeria(SAN) which means that i have my image to protect.This will be the last time i wish to say this,take the sum of $2200 usd to the closest Western Union in yur arear and send it to the name and address that i gave you.If you cannot do that,i am sorry, i will not be able to work for you in this transaction.
Try and do that immediately and send me the transfer data after you made the transfer so my secretary will be able to cash it from the Western Unin office here.
DAN EZE.
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/4/2005
Mr. Benuba,
Oh dear. The lawyer has quit. He said I was too slow and he had a reputation to uphold and that I was making him look foolish and that he would not trust me and did not want to work for me any more.
I am afraid that I don't know about western union, I thought it was a bank. If it is a store front or something like that I will look it up in the phone book and see what I can do, but now I have no place to send the money, since this Mr. Daneze has gotten so angry with me and quit.
You seem to be very angry with me too, and I have decided that I must go watch the Sound of Music, it is such an uplifting movie. Have you ever seen that movie? It makes me happy. Maybe you can watch it too, and we would both be happy, and we might be able to work together better.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 6/6/2005
Thank you very much and i am sure he said it out of anger.If you still want to continue with your transfer,then send him an email and tell him that you will send the money.
Try and talk to him and make him believe that you are very serious.Also for you to tell me that you do not know about Western Union is a big lie.Everybody knows it and it's the easiest and fastest way to send money.
This is not a child's play and if realy you are what you claim to be,then i see no reason why you should not be serious about this wholething.I might even give up myself if you do not get serious.You are suppose to be the one making frantic efforts to make this transactio a reality and not the other way round.
BEN UBA.
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/6/2005
Mr. Denzel,
Now Mr. Ebola is getting angry with me, too. I told him you wanted to quit, and he said I should contact you and beg for mercy. He also called me a liar because I did not know about western union. Of course I have heard about western union, but I though they were a bank, I did not know about sending money on the wire I thought this was something they did back when all there was was telegraphs.
Please, I will beg you as Mr. Benalu has demanded, not to quit. He wants me to be frantic. This whole thing has gotten me so stressed, and I had to get new balls and I've ordered new muffs. There was a beaver that broke in to my apartment last night, and I had to chase it out. I get especially stressed when chasing beaver. Combined with you and Mr. Benbols, the stress may just be too much.
So, please, do not quit! I do not want anyone to become more angry or more beavers to come in to my house!
Lizzie
Dan Eze
Date: 6/7/2005
I was expecting to hear that you have made the payment.If you have not,then go and so immediately because if you do not make that payment i will get started as i will not use other client's money to do your job for you.
Try as much as possible to make the payment today and give me the transfer informations so that my secretary can cash the money here.Remember the name and address i gave you.
You must be very rude to tell me that someone else asked you to beg me.That means you are not even sorry within yourself,you can keep your stupid apology,just make the payment or else,i will not do anything for you.The earlier you do that,the better for you.
DAN EZE.
Ellie Borden
Date: 6/7/2005
Mr. Ezenad,
I came to you humbly and with apologies and begged for you not to quit, and you just call me rude because I did not use the right words!? You call me stupid, but you want me to send you money!? How can this be? I was treated better by the racoon!
I demand an apology, or I will not send you any money.
Lizzie
The Tale of the Road Kill Casserole
Ellie BordenDate: 6/7/2005
Mr. Abu,
I did what you asked, and literally begged the lawyer not to quit. In response, he called me rude and stupid. I have not felt so terrible since the raccoon invaded my apartment. He has been such a bad man, to call me names when I never did him any harm.
The raccoon is dead, by the way. After I chased him from the apartment, he was run over by one of the kitchen help. I saw them scraping it off the pavement. That kitchen crew is sure an interesting lot - they are planning some kind of surprise casserole for tonight. I can hardly wait to see what they will make next!
If the lawyer will calm down and apologize, I might be able to continue with this. I like to finish what I start, but this lawyer has taken my apologies and just flung them back in my face with insults.
Lizzie
Ben Uba
Date: 6/8/2005
Dear Lizzy,
To be frank with you,i am fed up with all your excuses and if you feel you cannot work hard to see that your money is transferred,then forget it.
How on earth do you epect him to beg you when you are the one to be very serious about this issue.Please if you do not wish to continue and allow the banks confiscate the money,then forget it.
BEN UBA.
*Sigh* So long and thanks for all the fish!
Ellie Borden
Subject: Now understanding is complete
Date: 6/8/2005
Mr. Enbuba,
You know, you and the lawyer seem to be speaking with the same sense of hostility and bitterness. You must be very unhappy people. Maybe it comes from poverty. Maybe just from stupidity. Or even so, perhaps you were bitten by a rabid rodent and are insane?
Yet, somehow, your writing and that of this Mr. Ezendad appear to be so, so similar. In fact, it might lead one to believe that you are in fact... THE SAME PERSON! Oh my gosh... what a thought.
So, perhaps that might lead me to conclude that there is no money... and you are not actually Mr. Elubad, or Mr. Adenze...
And maybe, just maybe, I am not Lizzie Borden.
That might make sense, considering Lizzie Borden was an axe murderer from the 19th century who killed her mother and father. Take a look:
http://www.crimelibrary.com/lizzie/lizziemain.htm
So, you appear to have wasted your time trying to scam a poor old lady that died in 1927...
So long, and thanks for all the fish!
Lizzie
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