updated july 12 with delightful & clever insults from Mr Okon
Mr. George Okon, a sworn member of the International Order of the Dead Bank Customer Memorial, unwisely draws the attention of the Foreign Office.
George Okon Wema Bank
versus Sir Marmite Luny-Binns Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes Lord Bovril
and now joined by Thaneof Cawdor
and Princess Candice Windsor
George Okon
FROM THE DESK OF MR. GEORGE OKON
WEMA BANK PLC,
LAGOS-NIGERIA.
EMAIL:georgokon1@quick.cz
DEAR SIR,
STRICTLY A PRIVATE BUSINESS PROPOSAL
I AM MR. GEORGE OKON, THE MANAGER, BILLS AND
EXCHANGE AT THE FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT OF THE
WEMA BANK PLC. I AM WRITING
THIS LETTER TO ASK FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND COOPERATION
TO CARRY OUT THIS BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY IN MY
DEPARTMENT. WE DISCOVERED AN ABANDONED SUM OF
$15,000,000.00 (FIFTEEN MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS
ONLY) IN AN ACCOUNT THAT BELONGS TO ONE OF OUR FOREIGN
CUSTOMERS WHO DIED ALONG WITH HIS ENTIRE FAMILY OF A
WIFE AND TWO CHILDREN IN NOVEMBER 1997 IN A PLANE
CRASH.
SINCE WE HEARD OF HIS DEATH, WE HAVE BEEN EXPECTING
HIS NEXT-OF-KIN TO COME OVER AND PUT CLAIMS FOR HIS
MONEY AS THE HEIR,BECAUSE WE CANNOT RELEASE THE FUND
FROM HIS ACCOUNT UNLESS SOMEONE APPLIES FOR CLAIM AS
THE NEXT-OF-KIN TO THE DECEASED AS INDICATED IN OUR
BANKING GUIDELINES. UNFORTUNATELY, NEITHER THEIR
FAMILY MEMBER NOR DISTANTRELATIVE HAS EVER APPEARED TO
CLAIM THE SAID FUND. UPON THIS DISCOVERY,I AND OTHER
OFFICIALS IN MY DEPARTMENT HAVE AGREED TO MAKE
BUSINESS WITH YOU AND RELEASE THE TOTAL AMOUNT INTO
YOUR ACCOUNT AS THE HEIR OF THE FUND SINCE NO ONE CAME
FOR IT OR DISCOVERED HE MAINTAINED ACCOUNT WITH
OUR BANK, OTHERWISE THE FUND WILL BE RETURNED TO THE
BANKS TREASURY AS UNCLAIMED FUND.
WE HAVE AGREED THAT OUR RATIO OF SHARING WILL BE
AS STATED THUS;
30 % FOR YOU AS FOREIGN PARTNER,
60 % FOR US THE OFFICIALS IN MY DEPARTMENT AND
10% FOR THE SETTLEMENT OF ALL LOCAL AND
FOREIGN EXPENCES INCURRED BY US AND YOU DURING THE
COURSE OF THIS BUSINESS. UPON THE SUCCESSFUL
COMPLETION OF THIS TRANSFER, I AND ONE OF MY
COLLEAGUES
WILL COME TO YOUR COUNTRY AND MIND OUR SHARE. IT
IS FROM OUR 60 % WE INTEND TO IMPORT AGRICULTURAL
MACHINERIES INTO MY COUNTRY AS A WAY OF RECYCLING THE
FUND.
TO COMMENCE THIS TRANSACTION, WE REQUIRE YOU TO
IMMEDIATELY INDICATE YOUR INTEREST BY A RETURN E-MAIL
AND ENCLOSE YOUR PRIVATE CONTACT TELEPHONE NUMBER, FAX
NUMBER FULL NAME AND ADDRESS AND YOUR DESIGNATED
BANK COORDINATES TO ENABLE US FILE LETTER OF CLAIM TO
THE APPROPRIATE DEPARTMENTS FOR NECESSARY APPROVALS
BEFORE THE TRANSFER CAN BE MADE. NOTE ALSO, THIS
TRANSACTION MUST BE KEPT STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL
BECAUSE OF IT'S NATURE.
PLEASE SEND YOUR RESPONSE TO:georgeokon@rccgmail.org
I LOOK FORWARD TO RECEIVING YOUR PROMPT RESPONSE.
REGARDS,
MR. GEORGE OKON
WEMA BANK PLC.
To: georgeokon@rccgmail.org
Cc: Farnes-Barnes
Date: 24 Jun 2004, 01:26:28 AM
Subject: TO MR GOKON
Dear Mr Gokon
We are amazed and somewhat perturbed that you should have obtained access to this e-mail address so easily, as it something of a state secret. However your amazing story has rather piqued our interest and, after discussing it, we feel that further discussion is in order.
As it happens, the recent flood at Lord Stringfellow's second residence has meant that we are to bear a large refurbishment cost shortly (his famously expansive portico was quite sodden and there is some severe undulation of the grotto) and this may prove extremely fortuitous.
Please reassure us first that you are serious and genuine. I am copying this into the Royal Treasurer, Sir Farnes Barnes as he may be involved I imagine.
Best wishes
MARMITE
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns DFC
Regis Court Chamberlain
The Court of St James
Broadmoor
London FU2 GIT
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
To: georgokon@quick.cz
Date: 24 Jun 2004, 03:10:03 AM
Dear Mr Okon,
Sir Marmite Loony-Binns has passed me a copy of your e-mail to him.
In future, be so kind as to copy me in on all e-mails to Sir Marmite.
Yours sincerely,
Charles Farnes-Barnes
Senior Treasurer
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
To: georgokon1@quick.cz
Date: 24 Jun 2004, 03:16:29 AM
Subject: YOUR E-MAIL
Dear Mr Okon,
As Sir Marmite Loony-Binns informed you, he has passed to me your e-mail. In future, please copy me in on all e-mails to Sir Marmite.
Yours truly,
Charles Farnes-Barnes
Senior Treasurer
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
To: georgeokon@rccgmail.org
Date: 24 Jun 2004, 03:22:49 AM
Subject: YOUR E-MAIL
Dear Mr Okon,
As he informed you, Sir Marmite Loony-Binns has passed me a copy of your e-mail as I am the Senior Treasurer of his Department
In future, would you be so kind as to copy me in on all e-mails to Sir Marmite. My address is Farnes-Barnes and I would be grateful if you would not disclose this address to anyone else.
Yours sincerely,
Colonel Charles Farnes-Barnes
George Okon
From: George Okon georgeokon@yahoo.com
CC: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Thanks for responding to my email.
Date: Thu, 24 Jun 2004 14:42:23 -0700 (PDT)
Dear Sir Marmite Loony-Binns,
Thank you for responding to my email.I promise to keep
to your instruction.
This is real. I have the opportunity to know of this
because of my position at the bank.We must not waste
time. I have been praying for God to direct me to
somebody who will be willing and sincere with this
transaction.
Send me your telephone/fax numbers and your banking
particulars where you want the money transferred. As
soon as you do this, I will submit it to the bank on
your behalf.After which I send you a write-up which
you will send to the bank instructing them to transfer
the money into the account you have submitted earlier.
When the bank contacts you, you must always get back
to me so that I can advice you on what to say or do.
We must not make mistakes. I have spent so much time
and money to get this transaction to this stage.
Henceforth contact me on this email
address:georgeokon@yahoo.com Call me on phone
number:234 803 3191186 so that I can explain further
and get more acquinted with you.
George Okon
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
Date: 25 Jun 2004, 02:54:29 AM
Dear Sir Marmite,
I am now staying out of this correspondence until he needs to know which currency he prefers - Argentinean pesos, Canadian dollars or Slovakian silver dorks.
Regards to your dear cousin Lord Bovril who I suggest you contact as he may be interested in taking a piece of the action.
Remain blessed,
Charles
George Okon
To: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Advice me immediately.
Date: Thu, 24 Jun 2004 09:42:26 -0700 (PDT)
Dear Colonel Charles Farnes-Barnes,
Please do I have to send emails to Sir Marmite
Loony-Binns? The previous email I sent was sent to you
alone.Let me know immediately.
George Okon.
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
Dear Mr Okon,
To facilitate any transaction, please continue to correspond with Sir Marmite Loony-Binns.
However,like Sir Marmite, just send me copies of your letters to him. This will speed matters up to the benefit of all concerned.
Incidentally, I wonder if you might be related to Dr Claud Okon of Enugu, a very dear friend of mine who unfortunately passed away in 1999. We studied together at Cambridge University back in the early 1960s.
Best wishes,
Colonel Charles Farnes-Barnes
Charles
George Okon
To: Charles Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Thank you very much for the advice.
Date: Fri, 25 Jun 2004 03:24:52 -0700 (PDT)
Charles,
Thank you very much for the advice.
Am not related to your friend.I have heard of his
name. We are from different states.
George Okon
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
Dear Marmite,
I look forward to receiving copies of your correspondence with dear old George. So pleased he has heard about his namesake from my University days!
Kindest regards,
Charles
George Okon
CC: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Please get back to me immediately.
Date: Mon, 28 Jun 2004 00:51:37 -0700 (PDT)
Sir Marmite,
Please Sir I will appreciate if you can send me you
full names tel/fax numbers and your banking
particulars so that I can submit them to the bank
today. I had expected you to do this on friday.It is
important I submit them today.You don't have to waste
time. The earlier we star the better for us.Call me on
phone number:234 803 3191186 so that we can talk.I
will like to brief you more on the transaction.I hope
to hear from you as soon as possible.
George Okon.
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
To: georgeokon@yahoo.com
Date: 28 Jun 2004, 01:46:19 AM
Dear Mr Okon,
Thank you for sending me a copy of your e-mail of 28 June to Sir Marmite Loony-Binns.
You might like to know that Sir Marmite spent the weekend in Scotland at the country home of His Excellency The Thane of Cawdor. I am sure he will answer your letter as soon as he returns to England.
Yours sincerely,
Charles Farnes-Barnes
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns
To: georgeokon@yahoo.com
Cc: Farnes-Barnes
Date: 29 Jun 2004, 06:24:11 AM
My Dear Mr Okon
I am so sorry to hear that you have not yet received this information. I have been away bison hunting in Wales and had thought my equerry Ilichy Miracsky had done this already. Please accept my apologies. He can sometimes prove unreliable.
Ilichy also tells me your phone is not working. Please look into this. Perhaps a stray shell from the local fracas has hit the exchange?
My banking details are as follows:
Kustard Bank
13 Rillington Place
Usa Wanker
London
P1L 0CK
tel/fax 00 44 70 782 9283
The account is 6969419
Account handler is Mr Glassov Vimto
Please let me know if you need any further details. I look forward to seeing the money in my balance and no doubt you will get what you deserve too.
MARMITE
George Okon
To: Sir Marmite
CC: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Please get back to me immediately.
Date: Mon, 28 Jun 2004 00:51:37 -0700 (PDT)
Sir Marmite,
Please Sir I will appreciate if you can send me you
full names tel/fax numbers and your banking
particulars so that I can submit them to the bank
today. I had expected you to do this on friday.It is
important I submit them today.You don't have to waste
time. The earlier we star the better for us.Call me on
phone number:234 803 3191186 so that we can talk.I
will like to brief you more on the transaction.I hope
to hear from you as soon as possible.
George Okon.
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns
To: Farnes-Barnes
Cc: georgeokon@yahoo.com
Date: 29 Jun 2004, 06:30:06 AM
Subject: to Farnes Barnes re Okon matter
My dear Charles
Sorry about the delay old thing, Miracsky again, he found the drinks cabinet was unlocked. I have now given this native chappie what he wants. Cawdor sends his best wishes, and I have that bison trophy you want from Wales, ready for johnny taxidermist.
Golf still on this Friday?
M
George Okon
To: Charles Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Thank you for your email.
Date: Mon, 28 Jun 2004 09:56:52 -0700 (PDT)
Charles,
Please try and remind Sir Marmite Loony-Binns to send
me the items I demanded as soon as he comes back. It
is important we start off immediately.
George,
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
Dear Sir Marmite,
Please note the enclosed e-mail from Mr Okon. If you proceed with any transaction with this gentleman, may I respectfully suggest you use the Slovakian silver dorks account.
Yours sincerely,
Charles
Sir Charles Farnes-Barnes
Cc: georgeokon@rccgmail.org
Date: 30 Jun 2004, 03:14:52 AM
Subject: Mr Okon
Dear Sir Marmite,
Mr Okon needs your telephone number. May I suggest he uses your secure line [0]9067514644 ?
Alas, I cannot join you for golf on Friday as I have been summoned to a meeting with His Excellency The Thane of Cawdor who I believe is anxious to raise some cash for some urgent repair work to the West Wing of Dunsinane Castle.
Indeed, it occurs to me that you might let His Excellency have some part of this transaction with Mr Okon.
Yours sincerely,
Charles
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns
To: Farnes-Barnes
Cc: georgeokon@rccgmail.org
Date: 30 Jun 2004, 01:56:13 PM
Dear Charles
This is an excellent idea. That number is a secure one, and I am sure the native chap will find it useful.
A splendid idea about Cawdor. I will raise the matter with him when we next meet and let him in on the the ground floor. I know that his account at the Banquo Scotland is a little in need of replenishment following that costly inuguration of the Duchess of Duke Street.
MARMITE
George Okon
CC: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: You are not taking me serious.
Date: Fri, 2 Jul 2004 02:13:32 -0700 (PDT)
Marmite Luny-Binns,
Is like you are not taking this transaction serious. I
guess you are making fool of me.
How come you sent me a wrong phone number again.If you
are serious, I want you to come me on 234 803 3191186
now. My phone is working.
Have you heard from from the bank?i submited all the
particulars you sent me to them.I equally gave them
all instruction you gave me.As soon as you are
contacted, get back to me so that I can advice you on
what to do.
George.
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns
To: georgeokon@yahoo.com
Cc: Farnes-Barnes
Date: 02 Jul 2004, 04:57:18 AM
My dear Mr Okon
I greatly resent this accusation when, between the two of us, Mr Farnes Barnes and I have been doing our utmost to oil the wheels of commerce, as it were. As for giving out the wrong phone number, I can assure you that the receiver sits in my outer office (on a very fine Louis XIV desk as it happens) and is in perfect working order. If your tatty little native line cannot make contact then it hardly is my fault. While we are on the subject, I suggest that you check your own line once again. I have had my man Miracsky try a number of times to raise you, only to reach some sort of fast food outlet offer some ghastly monkey brain delicacy.
I doubt sir, if you are entirely serious. I had my suspicions, and these grow stronger by the day. I suggest that instead of this uppity town (to which I am entirely unused from the like of you) instead you and your gang get your own act in order and ensure that proper communicatons are set in order, rather than moping and whining like some banana republic costermonger on the make.
MARMITE
Wema Bank
From: "wema bank" <wemabankremittance2@mail2Banker.com>
To:
CC: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: ESTATE OF LATE ENGR. STEVE MOORE
Date: Thu, 1 Jul 2004 01:50:57 -0700
ATTENTION: SIR MARMITE LUNNY - BINNS
VIEW THE ATTACHED AND ACT ACCORDINGLY.
DR. YINKA ADEGBITE.
Dash it all, the blasted fellow has my my name spelt wrong.
Marmite Lunny-Binns,
Lets forget the controvercy and forge ahead. Have you
heard from the bank?Please you must not fail to inform
me when you are contacted.
The name of the late foriegner is Engineer Steve
Moore.My for number is:234 803 3191186.It is in
perfect condition.
George.
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns
To: georgeokon@yahoo.com
Cc: Farnes-Barnes
Date: 03 Jul 2004, 02:19:09 AM
Dear Mr Okon
I must admit that it has taken Charles Farnes Barnes a long time to bring me around to a degree of confidence in you after your previous outburst. However, despite my severe misgivings, he has finally managed to allay some of my more grievous misgivings, and we have reached a compromise of sorts.
Charles has suggested a small token representing mutual trust passes between yourself and us, perhaps a couple of dollars, upon which will rest our final judgement of the situation. If you wish to be represented as an honest man, as well as broker of our wishes, then he will provide the necessary details.
I am just off to Mount Bunter for a touch of skiiing, and hope that matters will be resolved with amicable fairness by the time I return.
MARMITE
PS Please do me the favour of spelling my name right old chap, this is not child's play you know.
George Okon
CC: Farnes-Barnes
Subject: Thank you for the email.
Date: Sat, 3 Jul 2004 10:47:58 -0700 (PDT)
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns,
Thank you for the email.I am happy you are willing to
go ahead with the transaction.I advice we cooperate
fully to make the transaction a succeess.
I which you a very happy weekend. Sorry for spelling
your name wrongly.
George.
Sir Marmite Luny-Binns
To: georgeokon@yahoo.com
Date: 05 Jul 2004, 06:21:45 AM