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Jackson Paul From: jackson_paul@rediffmail.com Sent: Saturday, August 13, 2005 To: jackson_paul@rediffmail.com Subject: NEXT OF KIN Dear Friend, I am very sorry to interrupt your peace since you are not expecting to receive any mail from me. However, I was obliged to do so due to the need and urgency of the message. I crave your indulgence and want to reassure you that I mean well to you and that it is only for our mutual benefit. So please do not be embarrassed. I sincerely write to seek your co-operation and trusts to enable me carry out an urgent business opportunity in my department. I am Mr. Jackson Paul, an account manager to Mr. E Wayne. Who died along with his family in the Asia Earth Quake Disaster (TSUNAMI DISASTER)http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2004/tsunami.disaster/ All of his Family lost there lives in the Disaster. Since then I have made several inquiries to his Country embassy to locate any of my client's extended Relatives, this has proved unsuccessful. After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to contact the Nigeria Chambers and Commence were I got your contact. My client was a successful and accomplished family man, who works with Shell Company here in Africa, He was sent to Asia (Sri Lanka) for a Special Assignment for his Company (Shell) were he died. He left in his domiciliary account a 40% of individual private deposit with our Bank, which I have with me the Investment Deposit Certificate an important document worth Six Million United Stats Dollars (US$6 Million). Until date I still manage this Deposit will like to know you personally and then I will give every consent to the Bank here as knowing you and state in Court here declaring you as the next of kin to my late client. I am contacting you to assist in repatriating the money left behind by my late client. The Bank will pay this money to you as an inheritance. After the sudden death of my client, and for the reason that there as has not been a next of kin to my late client, the bank has decided to forfeit the money and declare it as an abandoned property as there is no next of kin who should inherit his funds. The board of directors of his bank adopted a resolution and I was mandated to provide his next of kin for the payment of this money within 28 working days or forfeit the money to thebank as an abandoned property. The bankers had planned to invoke the abandoned property decree of 1996 to confiscate the funds after the expiration of the period given to me.I have reasoned very professionally and I feel it will be legally proper to present you as the next of kin of my deceased client, so that you can be paid the funds left in his bank account. I therefore seek your consent to present you as the Next of Kin to my Deceased client so that the proceeds of this Bank Account valued at Six Million United Stats Dollars (US$6 M) can be paid to you. The need for a foreigner as next of kin in this project is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner and a Nigerian will not perfectly fit in as his next of kin or heir. I have agreed that a reasonable percentage of the Fund would be giving to you as foreign partner, thereafter I will meet you in your country for disbursement. Please understand that my approach to you is based only on my positive reasoning and on the belief that you will not disappoint or betray me at last. The amount is fairly huge and we have agreed that on completion of the deal, you will be highly compensated for your assistance. An attorney will be contracted to help us revalidated and notarize all the necessary legal documents that can be used to back up any claim you may make as soon as I hear from you with your full consent to present you to the Bank as the next of kin to my late client and after both of us reach an agreement. All I require is your honest cooperation to enable us seeing this deal through. I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law. Please consider my official positions, reputation and integrity, especially, the opportunities in the business itself, it is very necessary that all due care be taken so that we do not miss the opportunity due to carelessness. You are therefore expected and advised to display high degree of maturity, responsibility and understanding in handling this information. I will give you all the details in my next mail when you have indicated your interest and commitment to work with me. Always remember that this is the highest confidence and trust any person can repose on the other, especially when it is considered that we did not know ourselves before. I hope you will honor me too. I will come over to join you in your Country for disbursement when the funds hit your account. More so for an effective and easy communication I will advice that you furnish me with your telephone and fax number. I await your response through my mail account; jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk THANKS Best Regards, Mr. Jackson Paul. Pedro Martinez To: jackson_paul@rediffmail.com, jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk Date: Aug 15, 2005 Dear Mr. Jackson Paul: I am delighted to hear from you. My only concern is that I am not an American citizen - in fact I am a Dominican Republic national. If this does not pose a problem, then give me the signs. Best Regards Pedro Martinez Jackson Paul From: jackson paul <jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk> Date: Aug 15, 2005 Subject: WAY FORWARD Dear pedro, Thanks for your mail and your resolve to work with me in realizes this project. In this project I will present you as the next of kin to the deceased person consequently all application for the release of the funds will be made to your nominated bank account. As you will provide the bank protection and stand as next of kin to the deceased person and beneficiary to the funds. After all application by the lawyer I will contact here to defend the claim to represent you in the defense of the claim and stand as the lawyer to the deceased person and executor of the will. After transfer we shall share as stipulated in my first letter though I will re-invest my share in your country as I intend to go into a formal investment agreement with you so as to confer on you the right to invest and manage my funds for me after we have entered into comprehensive investment agreement relationship. Please note very well 35% for you 60% for me while 5% is set aside to cover all expenses, you know if the funds is transferred there will be bank charges, the bank will take there charges and some taxes will be paid and when it comes over to your country too your bank will also take some charges and your country will tax the money somehow, this is why I earmarked out the 5% and from there also whatever we expended on the project will be refunded to us, any incidental expenses you and me insured will be refunded including phone bills etc. Please send me; 1.Your direct phone. 2.Your mobile number 3.Fax number including your office or home Address With the above mentioned information I will look for a lawyer that will secure the document that will present you as the rightful next of kin. And i will also send to you the text application form. for you to fill and send it to the bank for more confermation. Also for constant communication as you know that this project needs constant communication. Thanks as I await your urgent reply. Yours truly, Mr. Jackson Paul. Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 15, 2005 Dear Mr. Jackson Paul I am glad to hear back from you. I was afraid that your offer was too good to be true, and you might leave me hanging over the plate. I am on the road for my job a lot, so I don't have access to a fax machine. I'm sure you can scan anything you need to send me. You can reach me at 206.202.1619. If I don't answer, leave a message and I will call you back. Email is always the easiest however. Please, Mr. Jackson Paul, could you send me a copy of your international passport so I can be sure of your identity? I wouldn't like it if you were trying to put me in a squeeze play. Best Regards- Mr. Pedro Martinez [He very kindly attached a poorly doctored passport for me.] Jackson Paul From: <jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk> Date: Aug 16, 2005 Subject: FILL THE APPLICATION AND SEND IT TO THE BANK Dear Pedro, how are you today?i hope you are fine and i hope this mail get to you in good condition and also in good state of mind. this is what you will do to make this fast to us i will send to you the text of application that you fill and send it to the bank for confamation. as soon as you do that. pls also send to me the text of application so that i my self can see the way you fill it. what ever the bank send to you i will give you the information on what to do. And the attach file is my International passport so that you will know hom you dealling with. thanks i wait for your urgent reply. Mr. Jackson Paul. ........................................................ To: THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS =STANDARD TRUST BANK PLC HEAD OFFICE, 104 MARINA ROAD -LAGOS E-MAIL ADDRESS: info_standard_trustbank_plc@yahoo.com ATTENTION: DR. CHARLES BALOGUN (DIRECTOR GENERAL ) STANDARD TRUST BANK PLC DEAR SIR, I WRITE CONCERNING MY LATE RELATION, Engineer Edward Wayne . WHO DIED IN AN Asia Earth Quake Disaster (TSUNAMI DISASTER) WITH HIS FAMILY . BEFORE HIS DEATH THE LATE Engineer Edward Wayne WORKED WITH SUMMIT OIL COMPANY IN NIGERIA, HEREBY CONFIRM THAT I, ----------------------- IS THE NEXT-OF-KIN/BENEFICIARY TO LATE Engineer Edward Wayne , SIR AFTER MY SERIOUS INVESTIGATION AND LONG ENQUIRIES, I DISCOVERED THAT MY LATE- Engineer Edward Wayne DEPOSITED WITH YOUR BANK STANDARD TRUST BANK PLC (ST), THE SUM OF USD6 MILLION BEFORE HIS DEATH. SIR, I WILL APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WILL GIVE THIS MY APPLICATION PROPER ATTENTION AND MY LATE RELATION'S DEPOSIT FUND OF USD6MILLION WITH YOUR BANK (ST) PAID TO ME INTO MY NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT BY TELEGRAPHIC MONEY TRANSFERS AS MY PERSONAL AND BANK INFORMATION ARE LISTED BELOW: MY FULL NAME AND ADDRESS: MY MOBILE TELEPHONE NUMBER : MY BANK'S NAME : MY BANK BRANCH ADDRESS : .MY BANK PHONE NUMBER : MY BANK FAX NO., MY ACCOUNT NAME : MY NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER : SWIFT CODE: ROUTING NUMBER : ROUTING INSTRUCTIONS: (MY) ACCOUNT NUMBER: DEARSIR, I THANK YOU FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION WHILE I REMAIN TO RECEIVING YOUR URGENT RESPONSE. YOURS TRULY Mr Pedro Martinez, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 16, 2005 Dear Mr. Jackson Paul: Thanks for the prompt reply. And thank you for the copy of your passport - I can now see that you are a man of integrity. I'll go ahead and send the form to the bank. This is better than the 04 ALCS and my new contract in New York all rolled into one - I can just feel it! We're going to be great teammates. Yours truly, Pedro Martinez. [I like to think that Pedro lives at Shea Stadium but still banks in the Dominican Republic.] Pedro Martinez To: info_standard_trustbank_plc@yahoo.com Date: Aug 16, 2005 To: THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS =STANDARD TRUST BANK PLC HEAD OFFICE, 104 MARINA ROAD -LAGOS E-MAIL ADDRESS: info_standard_trustbank_plc@yahoo.com ATTENTION: DR. CHARLES BALOGUN (DIRECTOR GENERAL ) STANDARD TRUST BANK PLC DEAR SIR, I WRITE CONCERNING MY LATE RELATION, Engineer Edward Wayne . WHO DIED IN AN Asia Earth Quake Disaster (TSUNAMI DISASTER) WITH HIS FAMILY . BEFORE HIS DEATH THE LATE Engineer Edward Wayne WORKED WITH SUMMIT OIL COMPANY IN NIGERIA, HEREBY CONFIRM THAT I, Pedro Martinez IS THE NEXT-OF-KIN/BENEFICIARY TO LATE Engineer Edward Wayne , SIR AFTER MY SERIOUS INVESTIGATION AND LONG ENQUIRIES, I DISCOVERED THAT MY LATE- Engineer Edward Wayne DEPOSITED WITH YOUR BANK STANDARD TRUST BANK PLC (ST), THE SUM OF USD6 MILLION BEFORE HIS DEATH. SIR, I WILL APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WILL GIVE THIS MY APPLICATION PROPER ATTENTION AND MY LATE RELATION'S DEPOSIT FUND OF USD6MILLION WITH YOUR BANK (ST) PAID TO ME INTO MY NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT BY TELEGRAPHIC MONEY TRANSFERS AS MY PERSONAL AND BANK INFORMATION ARE LISTED BELOW: MY FULL NAME AND ADDRESS: Pedro Martinez 123-01 Roosevelt Ave. Flushing, NY 11368 MY MOBILE TELEPHONE NUMBER : 206-202-1619 MY BANK'S NAME : Banco Central de la Dominica Republica MY BANK BRANCH ADDRESS : Calle Pedro Henr„quez Ure„a esq. Leopoldo Navarro, Santo Domingo Rep„blica Dominicana Apartado Postal 1347 .MY BANK PHONE NUMBER : Tel„fono: (809) 221-9111 MY NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER : 0450199203 SWIFT CODE: S.W.I.F.T BCRDDOSX DEARSIR, I THANK YOU FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION WHILE I REMAIN TO RECEIVING YOUR URGENT RESPONSE. YOURS TRULY Mr Pedro Martinez Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 16, 2005 Dear Mr. Jackson Paul: Here is a copy of the message I sent to the bank. You see, I am not an American citizen but rather a citizen of the Dominican Republic. I work in New York for 6 months of the year. Sometimes it runs a little longer, but due to no run support and a subpar bullpen I will likely be heading back to the Dominican at the end of September. I will let you know what the bank responds! Yours Truly, Pedro Martinez [I absolutely love this guy's name. It's like Duane Wayne or Roseanne Roseanna-Danna but worse.] Saleh G. Saleh From: STANDARD TRUSTBANK >info_standard_trustbank_plc@yahoo.com> Date: Aug 16, 2005 Subject: OUR RESPONSES TO YOUR APPLICATION ATTN: MR PEDRO , YOUR APPLICATION HAVE BEEN RECEIVED TODAY 16/08/2005 . I AM ADVISE TO TELL YOU TO FORWARD TO THIS OFFICE WITHOUT FURTHER DELAY FOR THE PROCESSING OF YOUR INHERITANCE AND TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT WITHIN THE NEXT 72HOURS YOU SUBMIT ALL THE REQUIRED DOCUMENTS. YOUR FUND WILL BE TRANSFERED INTO YOUR ACCOUNT.THE FOLLOWINGS: 1.LETTER OF ADMINSTRATION FROM THE HIGH COURT HERE. 2.AFFIDVAT OF CLAIM FROM THE SAME COURT HERE. 3.DEATH CERTIFICATE AS OF THE TIME HE DIED. 4.PROBATE DEEDS 5.DEPOSIT CERTIFICATE AS OF THE TIME HE MADE THE DELOSIT TO OUR BANK. WE ARE WAITING TO RECEIVE YOUR CONFORMATION. My Regards, SALEH G. SALEH FOR STANDARD TRUST BANK NIG.PLC. 234-1-470-2345 Pedro Martinez To: <jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk> Date: Aug 16, 2005 Subject: Fwd: OUR RESPONSES TO YOUR APPLICATION Dear Mr. Jackson Paul: Here is what the bank sent me. Hopefully you can get a base hit with this info. Get back to me! Yours, Pedro Martinez Jackson Paul Date: Aug 16, 2005 Subject: HEAR IS THE LAWYER CONTACT THAT CAN HELP US TO GET THE DOCUMENT Dear Pedro, thanks for the mail you send to me.and i hope this mail get to you in good condition. there is noting to worry about. there is a lawyer that can help us to get all the document they need. this is the lawyer contact email address: barrister_galvin2004@yahoo.it contact hem as soon as this mail get to now. And tell him that you are the brother to my late client. also tell him the names of the document you want him to get for you. what ever he said to you pls let me know. and you can aswell call me for more details. hear is my phone number : 234-8033-998471 Thanks as i wait your reply. Jackson Paul, Pedro Martinez To: barrister_galvin2004@yahoo.it Cc: jackson paul <jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk> Date: Aug 16, 2005 Dear Barrister: I need the following, as I am the brother of the late Mr. E Wayne, client of Mr. Jackson Paul. We were separated at birth; he grew up in Asia and I grew up in the Dominican Republic, under a mango tree. I went on to rousing success in my field of dreams, while my brother met his demise in the Tsunami. While I was winning Cy Young awards, my brother was slaving away as an engineer. While I was making money hand over foot in Boston, my brother was apparently embezzeling $6Million USD. Anyway, please send me the following documents: 1.LETTER OF ADMINSTRATION FROM THE HIGH COURT HERE. 2.AFFIDVAT OF CLAIM FROM THE SAME COURT HERE. 3.DEATH CERTIFICATE AS OF THE TIME HE DIED. 4.PROBATE DEEDS 5.DEPOSIT CERTIFICATE AS OF THE TIME HE MADE THE DELOSIT TO OUR BANK. Best Regards, Pedro Martinez Barrister Galvin From: <barrister_galvin2004@yahoo.it> Date: Aug 17, 2005 Dear Pedro, I am in receipt of your mail. I will start the processing but if what i have is not enough,I will let you know so that you will assist me with the little you. I will get back to you as i proceed. Barrister Galvin [Let's start pushing the nicknames. Joe Kerrigan was the pitching coach in Boston for alot of Petey's career there.] Pedro Martinez To: <barrister_galvin2004@yahoo.it> Date: Aug 17, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: I will certainly be available to pitch on 3 days rest if you need more information from me. Just ask, and I will send the heat. I'm so excited about this transaction. One thing: Could you please call me 'Petey'? That's what old Joe Kerrigan used to call me and it sort of warms my heart. Thanks! -Pedro [So, Jackson, Reggie Jackson, Mr. October... the wheels are turning. Although I hate to use a Yankee in my scambait, he played before my time and all I remember of him was the candy bar.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 17, 2005 Subject: Re: I AM SO HELP Jackson, I am so happy too. Your name reminds me of a young Mr. October. (Lousy Yankees...) Hopefully the lawyer will get those documents to me as soon as possible. We don't need to be caught in a rundown. Yours, Pedro Martinez Jackson Paul Date: Aug 17, 2005 Subject: I AM SO HAPPY Dear Pedro, Thanks for the mail you forward to me. I am very happy for that writeup you send to the lawyer hope to hear from hem. Thanks as i wait for your reply from the lawyer. Jackson Paul, Jackson Paul Date: Aug 17, 2005 Subject: GOD IS WITH US Dear Pedro, Thanks for your mail you send to me.and i hope this mail get to you in good state of mind. I am very happy for that. pls i wan't to inform you that this is very porsitive man so what ever he told you to du pls du it. and mind the way you tolk to he. so that he will not be angrey with you ok. thanks be to God who make it porsible for us. thanks Jackson Paul, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 17, 2005 Dear Jackson: I will be very respectful to the Barrister! I'll treat him as if he were a home plate umpire - what he says goes - no questions! Jackson, since we are becoming friends, I would like you to refer to me by my nickname "Petey". I will also give you a nickname - "Mr. October". (In the clubhouse, it is important to give people nicknames.) May God be with you my friend! Your friend, Pedro (Petey) Jackson Paul Date: Aug 19, 2005 Subject: PLS LET ME KNOW. Dear Petey, How are toady? i hope you are fine if so glory be to God. i hope this mail get to you in good condition and in good state of mind. how far have you gone what the lawyer. has he got the documents for you pls let me know because very soon the bank will stely contact you for the documents. if he has not pls contact hem and as hem how far he has gone he sheld let you know. and tell hem that he sheld pls help you and make it ferst. and what ever he said you sheld do. do it pls to save time. there no time letf for us to dela. Thanks as i wait your urgent reply. Jackson Paul, [attempt #1 to get Pedro to send money. I think he assumes Pedro has ESP because he hasn't provided any guidance.] Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 19, 2005 Subject: THIS IS WHAT IS REMANING DEAR PETEY, HOW ARE TODAY? I HOPE YOU ARE FINE. I HAVE GOT TWO OF THE DOCUMENT WITH THE MONEY I HAVE WITH ME. SO IT REMANING OTHERS. AND THE REMANING WILL COST $1,500 TO GET THEM READY TOMORROW. SO THIS IS HOW YOU ARE GOING TO SEND THE MONEY TO ME SO THAT I CAN GET ALL THE DOCUMENT READY TOMORROW FOR YOU AND AS WELL TAKE IT TO THE BANK FOR THE RELEASING OF YOUR CLAIMS SEND THE MONEY THROUGH WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER AS SOON AS YOU DO THAT GET BACK TO ME WITH THE IN FORMATIONS YOU USE IN SENDING IT TO ME, I WAIT YOUR URGENT REPLY, Mr, BARRISTER GALVIN, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 19, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I have recieved a message from Barrister Galvin. He has some of the documents, but he needs some money for one other. I will work this out with him! My friend, I think we are only a few innings away from a lot of money! I think were talking A-Rod money here! I will let you know what happens with Barrister Galvin. May god be with you and may all your steroid tests come out negative. Your friend, Petey Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 19, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: I am ready and excited to go forward! However, $1500 is a lot of money for one document! Let me throw a change up at you for a second: I talked to my agent about this (keeping strict confidence!) and he says I should go ahead and send you the money by Western Union. Okay! But first he demands you send us an INVOICE. That way when the IRS comes knocking on my door, I don't have to take it in the four-hole. PLEASE HURRY WITH THIS INVOICE SO WE CAN GET THE DOCUMENTS READY! Your friend, Petey Jackson Paul Date: Aug 20, 2005 Subject: DO YOUR BEST TO SEND THE MONEY TO HIM Dear Pedro, Thanks for the update and happy we will work this out soon. All you have to do now is to make sure you send him the money so that everything will be concluded by next week as planed. Send the money to him as soon as possible and let me know about it immediately.I am looking to hear a good news from you. Jackson Paul. [Pedro is not happy that his nickname disappeared. He's even less happy about Jackson's nickname.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 20, 2005 Dear Mr. October, I would prefer if you would call me Petey. Your friend, Pedro Martinez Jackson Paul Subject: WAITING TO HEAR FROM YOU Dear Petey, Thanks for the mail you send to me.and i hope this mail get to you in good state of mind. have you send the money to the lawyer and what did he say. did he say that the document will be read on moday. pls let me know pls do what you will do to make it fast for us there is know time for us to wait. pls do what ever the lawyer said you should do so that it will be fast for us bey moday he can take it to the bank for you. Thanks yours friend Mr. October, [Scott Boras is a real life agent of the most sinister kind. This guy is a pit bull. I decided to name him in the style of Engineer E Wayne. He is now Superagent Scott Boras. Always all three names for a man of his abilities!] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 21, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I have been in contact with Barrister Galvin. He is going to send me an invoice for his legal fees, and then I will send him the money. We should then be clear on all required documents! Can you feel how close we are to getting the money? If Barrister Galvin does not work out, we can hire Superagent Scott Boras. He can get things done. He got Beltran a sweet deal here in New York, and he got Pudge Rodriguez a great deal as well (but he has to work in Detroit, which stinks.) Let's give the attorney one more chance then we'll go with my guy. Your friend- Petey Jackson Paul Date: Aug 22, 2005 Subject: WAITING TO HEAR FROM YOU Dear Mr.Petey, Thanks for your mail to me. and i hope this mail get to you in good state of mind. I will be waiting to hear from you to the lawyer Thanks. Mr. October, [Again, I hate to use Yankees, but these are some real Yogi Berra quotes just to confuse him. He played before my time as well - but I enjoyed Yogi Bear as a youngster.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 22, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I'm in a great state of mind... still waiting to hear from the Barrister! But I have the utmost confidence in this transaction. Remember: You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there. If you come to a fork in the road, take it. And most importantly, It ain't the heat; it's the humility. I'll send you an email when the Barrister mails me the invoice. Your friend, Petey Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 22, 2005 Dear Mr. October I'm getting very worried about Barrister Galvin - why hasn't he sent me an invoice or responded to me? Are you sure he is as reputable as superagent Scott Boras? I could call Superagent Scott Boras and have him check into Barrister Galvin if you want me to. Your friend- Petey [This guy is all business. Attempt #2 to get money.] Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 20, 2005 Subject: INFO FOR WESTERN UNION Dear Pedro Martinez, Thanks for your mail. I am sending to you thte name which you will use to send the money through western union money transfer and i will immediately send to you the payment receipt of the money you paid to me for your legal servives.I am suppose to get this transaction concluded by now but only that i was short of money and i did not waste time to let you know about it,I will be through by monday or tuesday so try all you could to send the money today so that by monday everything will concluded and i know when you confirm your fund into your account by tuesday,you will in return compensate me well,when you see my work. HERE IS THE WESTERN UNION INFO: NAME:FREDERICK WILLIAM ADDRESS:LAGOS-NIGERIA MTCN............................... TEXT QUESTION:PEDRO TEXT:ANSWER: MARTINEZ SENDER NAME AND ADDRESS I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO SEE INFORMATION BY END OF TODAY AGANST MONDAY. Regards, Barr.Galvin Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 21, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: I am promising to mail you the money (I know this is urgent!) You need to send me an invoice - it's standard business practice. Send me a detailed invoice, and then I will send payment for the legal fees. Seriously, I'm thinking of firing you and hiring superagent Scott Boras. That guy can get anything done. And as we all know, it's all about the money. -Pedro Jackson Paul [Nice! Jackson is warming up to the idea of Superagent Scott Boras! He must have seen Jerry Maguire.] Date: Aug 23, 2005 Subject: GIVE HIM TODAY Dear petey, thanks for the mail you send to me. and i hope this mail get to you in good state of mind. my self i am so worry two.but lets give him today if he did not send it to you so you can go aheard to contact Mr.Scott Boras, thanks as we wait to hear from him. Mr. October [Attempt #3 to get money. Different western union coordinates. He attaches an invoice done in the usual seventh grader style which has a grand total of $9000. We do find out that Galvin is his FIRST name. Like Earthworm Jim or Chef Paul.] Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 23, 2005 Subject: THIS IS THE INVOICE DEAR PEDRO, I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE DELAY, THIS IS THE INVOICE YOU ASK FOR SO YOU CAN NOW SEND THE MONEY TO THE COURT SO THAT THEY CAN RELEASE THE REMAINING DOCUMENT TO ME, SO THAT I CAN TAKE IT TO THE BANK TODAY. FOR THE CLAIMS OF YOUR MONEY, HOPE YOU WILL HONOUR ME TWO, THANKS BEST REGARD Mr.BARRISTER GALVIN, PAYMENT IN FORMATIONS, SENDER NAME AND ADDRESS: QUETION: ANWSER: RECEIVER NAME: JIMOH LUKMAN OLAWALE RECEIVER ADDRESS: 1/3 ADEDEJI STREET ITIRE S/LERE LAGOS, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 23, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: What happened?????? You told me that the fee for creating the document was $1500. Next you send me an invoice for $9000!!! What is going on here? Are you trying to put the squeeze play on me? I thought we agreed on $1500. For $9000 I could hire superagent Scott Boras and he'd get me a deal with any team I wanted. Please explain this immediately! Pedro [Some background... Gerald 'Ice' Williams. He played for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays in 2000. In retaliation for something, Pedro plunked him in the first inning. Ice then charged the mound starting a bench clearing brawl. Pedro, enraged, then proceeded to take a no hitter into the ninth inning. One of the best pitching performances I have ever seen. Fast forward to 2005. Both Pedro and Gerald are on the Mets. Pedro has a no hitter going into the ninth. Fly ball into the outfield, Williams is going for it... and he misses it, wrecking the no hitter! Karma? Who knows. Lets take it out on Barrister Galvin.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 23, 2005 Dear Mr. October: We have a BIG PROBLEM. That Barrister told me that it would be $1500 for the documents. I feel that is a completely reasonable amount to charge for the procurement of documents! Then, that spitball throwing bat corking shark sends me an invoice for $9000!! You don't need me to tell you, my friend, that is insanity. We need to fire him and hire Superagent Scott Boras! He'll help us get your money. Just give me the word, Mr. October, and I'll make the call. If you don't like that idea, maybe I could come to your country to handle this in person. I have a long stretch of time off coming soon (no thanks to Gerald "Ice" Williams...) Your friend, Petey [Attempt #4. No western Union details at all. Don't scammers put in any effort anymore?] Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 23, 2005 Subject: IS NOT WHAT YOU THANK DEAR PEDRO, THANKS FOR THE MAIL, IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK, ALL YOU NEED TO PAY. IS THE DOCUMENT FEE OF $1,500 ONLY, HOPE YOU WILL HONOUR ME TOO, IF THIS FUND IS TRANFERED TO YOUR ACCOUNT, THANKS Mr. BARRISTER GALVIN, PAYMENT INFORMATION DETAILS: THE SECRET QUESTION : THE ANSWER: SENDER'S NAME: SENDER'S ADDRESS: THE CONTROL NUMBER: RECIEVER'S NAME: RECIEVER'S ADDRESS: Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 23, 2005 Barrister Galvin: You know, Superagent Scott Boras would never have let something like this slip. OK, so we agree that I will pay you $1500. In return, you will process all documents, and we will transfer the fund into my account. What do you mean that you hope I will honor you? I don't swing from both sides of the plate, Mr. Galvin. Pedro Martinez likes only women! I will mail the check immediately. Pedro Martinez Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 23, 2005 Dear Mr. October: OK, that minor league excuse of a lawyer has finally come up with the right total. I am sending him payment immediately. One thing, though, my friend! Can we FIRE him and hire SUPERAGENT SCOTT BORAS??? Your Barrister asked me to perform homosexuality with him after I got the money into the account... Pedro is NOT a switch hitter. (I'm barely a hitter at all.) Oh, I am so excited to receive the documents! We are so close to releasing this fund! Your friend- Petey Jackson Paul Date: Aug 23, 2005 Subject: GOD IS ON OUR SAID Dear Petey, Thanks for your mail you send to me. if you will come over to nigeria that will couase you more. but if you can make it. i will be happy to see you in my country, pls tell the lawyer that you will only pay hem the some of $1,500 if he agree, make the payment to hem,so that we will not delay in this business.but if he did not agree to collet the money,cotact me urgently so that i will tell you what to do. I PRAY THAT GOD WILL MAKE HEM TO AGREE Thanks Your friend Mr. October Jackson Paul Date: Aug 24, 2005 Subject: MAKE THE PAYMENT TODAY DEAR PETEY, I AM SO GLAD TO WRITE YOU THIS MAIL.AS A MATTER OF FACT, I WANT YOU TO GO AHEAD AND MAKE THE PAYMENT TODAY.PLEASE, I WANT YOU TO DO ACCORDLY TO WHAT YOU MENTIONED THAT YOU WILL MAKE THE PAYMENT. THIS TRANSCATION DOES NOT PERMIT DELAY .I WANT YOU TO MAKE THE PAYMENT TO ENABLE WE MOVE AHEAD AND THIS DOCUMENTS ARE VERY MUCH IMPORTANT.AS YOU HAVE APPLIED TO THE BANK AS THE NEXT OF KIN YOU NEED TO HAVE THIS DOCUMENTATION THAT WILL PROVE YOU AS THE LEGITAMTE NEXT OF KIN TO THE BANK. MY DEAR BROTHER,I WILL WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND MY WORD AND WITH THE TRUST THAT I HAVE IN YOU, I BELIEVE WE WILL MAKE A BETTER MOVE. AFTER YOU MADE THE PAYMENT TODAY. PLEASE, E-MAIL ME TO GET ME NOTIFY. DO NOT HESIATE TO MAKE THE PAYMENT TODAY.PLEASE,FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS TO AVOID ANY MISTAKES IN THIS TRANSACTION.THANK YOU AND MAY GOD BLESS YOU ABUNDANTLY. BEST REGARDS. MR.OCTOBER. Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 24, 2005 Subject: WAITING DEAR PEDRO MARTINEZ, THANKS FOR YOU MAIL TO ME. I AM WAITING FOR THE PAYMENT DETAILES SO THAT I CAN TELL THE COURT THAT THE PAYMENT HAVE BEEN MADE SO THAT THEY CAN RELEASE THE DOCUMENT TO ME, SO THAT I CAN SCAN IT AND SEND IT TO YOU TO VIEW IT BEFOR I WILL SEND IT TO THE BANK, FOR COMFERMATIONS THANKS AS I WAIT YOUR URGENT REPLY, MR. BARRISTER GALVIN, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 24, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: Excellent. I just put into the mail a check for $1500 for the document fee. The rest of the charges on the invoice you sent me I assume will be taken out of the millions? I sent it to the address located on the invoice: Barrister Galvin Mahmud Fidelity Associates #123 Irosi Blvd Victoria Island Nigeria I sent it by Airmail so you should have it quicker than a split-fingered fastball! Regards, Pedro Martinez Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 24, 2005 Subject: URGENT HELLO PEDRO, I GOT YOUR MAIL BUT WAS NOT CLEAR WITH THE INFORMATION ON HOW I CAN RETRIEVE THE PAYMENT FROM THE BANK, YOU KNOW YOU HAVE TO SEND IT VIA WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER AND YOU NEED TO GIVE ME THE CONTROL NO:THE TEXT QUESTION AND ANSWER:AND YOUR OWN HOUSE ADDRESS,SO TO FACILITATE THE QIUCK RECOVERY OF THE FEE FROM THE BANK, SO WE CAN GET THINGS DONE IN DUE CAUSE......YOU NEED TO COLLECT THE MONEY BACK AND SENT IT THORUGH WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER....... Mr., BARRISTER GALVIN, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 24, 2005 Dear Mr. October: My dear friend, I have sent the payment to Barrister Galvin! We are so close now, I can feel the tension! Are you as excited as I? What are you going to do with your share of the money? I was thinking about buying the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. I would then load that bunch of AAA wanabees onto an old steamer and then sink it. Charge the mound at me, will they? I don't think so. Anyway, when Barrister Galvin sends me the document, I will let you know! Your friend, Petey Jackson Paul Date: Aug 24, 2005 Dear Petey, i was very happy when i got your mail, but the problem is i just got a call from the barrister ,and he told me you did not give the right information to him on how to retrieved the payment,pls you need to do this as fast as you can so that you and me can enjoy what we've been working for sometime now.like i told you earlier on the barrister is a no nonsense human being and he respect agrrement to the latter,so don't let him go angry,so try as much as possible to make the payment as instructed,we need to thank God we are almost there. yours friend, Mr. October Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 24, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I want you to know how badly I want this transaction to be finished! But I need you to understand - your Barrister Galvin failed to give me correct information! Normally, in business transactions, an invoice is received and then a check is mailed! This hurts more than a torn rotator cuff. My good friend, what am I supposed to do? I mailed a check to Africa for $1500! How do I know that when it arrives that the incompetent Barrister Galvin will not cash it and rob my money? None of this would have happened if we had hired Superagent Scott Boras like I suggested in the first place. Your friend, Petey Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 24, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: One thing we don't really tolerate here in the majors in incompetence (except maybe in the case of Mark Bellhorn, but what can you do.) I am going to confer with my partner Mr. Jackson Paul. It is my wish to terminate your services and hire someone who can get the job done, Superagent Scott Boras. I will get back to you after Mr. Jackson Paul and I have come to a decision regarding your employment. Regards, Pedro Martinez Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: ACT FARST GO AND RELL SEND THE MONEY Dear petey, Thanks for the mail you send to me,and i hope this mail get to you in god state of mind. I will like you to understand me. luke let me tell you if you said that you wan't us to invert in your barrister is go to be deficut becoaus the cout he none olly barrister Galvin as the lawyer that is come for this document so if will invert Scott they will know that what is go on in this business, so my brother i will like you to act as the lawyer instruted you. pls dont lat this delay. sone the bank we contact you and they are going to ask you of the documents and if you dont get it they will think that you are not the rell brother to my late claint, so go and pay the money to the barrister galvin today as soon as you recive this mail. and for your chek you sent to the him you can tamilet it and send the money to him as he instruted you to du. Thanks Mr. October Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: URGENT DEAR Pedro, THANKS FOR MAIL TO ME, I HAVE MY WORD TO YOU THAT AS SOON AS YOU SEND THE MONEY TO ME SO THAT I CAN GET THE DOCUMENT REDY FOR YOU I WILL SCAN IT AND SEND IT TO YOU TO VIEW. SO SEND THE MONEY AS I HAVE INSTRUTED YOU.SEND IT TODAY SO I CAN TAKE IT TO THE BANK FOR YOUR FUNS TO BE TRANSFER TO YOU ACCOUNT, GO AND SEND THE MONEY AND GIVE THE DITELLS, THANKS BARRISTER GALVIN, [Ahh, the Don Zimmer moment. I love Pedro Martinez.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I can't understand your email. And I told you I'm not impressed with this Barrister. I think he is cut rate, unprofessional and I cannot in good faith do business with him. He would get cut from Single-A camp on the first day, tossing his 60mph fastballs. So my friend, we have 2 choices. 1. You find a competent Barrister. There must be another in Nigeria who has more skill than your overpaid whiny batboy. 2. I get Superagent Scott Boras to handle this. I'm not joking, my good friend, when I tell you that this man can get ANYTHING done. As far as Barrister Galvin, I say we give him a Don Zimmer - One hand on each ear and a faceplant into the infield. Your friend, Petey Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: Mr. Jackson Paul and I have decided to terminate your services. Good luck in your future lawyerly duties. Maybe you could represent Rafael Palmeiro next time he wants to perjure himself in front of Congress. Regards, Pedro Martinez [Getting fired doesn't mean a thing anymore. Just keep on pluggin! Attempt #5 to get western union money, again with no payment details.] Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: I GIVE YOU MY WORDS DEAR PEDRO, THANKS FOR YOUR MAIL TO ME.AFTER I HAVE WORK MY BEST FOR YOU. ORREAD TWO OF THE DOCUMENT IS WITH ME. AND LET ME TELL YOU SOME THINK UOY DON'T UNDERSTAND. THAT WITH THIS TWO DOCUMENT THAT IS ME, THE COUT WILL NOT HEAR FROM YOU AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION BEFOR YOU GO AHEARD TO GET ENEY BARRISTER TELL THE BARRISTER THAT YOU HAVE CONTACTED A BARRISTER BEFOR HIM AND SEE WHAT HE WILL SEA. LUKE MY FRIEND THERE IS NOTTING TO WORRY ABOUT BECOAUS WITH ME HEAR FOR YOU EVERY THING WILL BE POSIBLE. LET ME MAKE THIS CLEAR TO YOU WHAT IS HODING THIS DOCUMENT IS ONLY THE MONEY $1,500 FOR THE COUT I WESH I HAVE THE MONEY AS I SAID TO YOU BEFOR I PROCIED IN THIS BUSINESS OF YOURS I HOULD HAVE PAY THE MONEY, THANKS AS I WAIT TO HEAR FROM YOU AND Mr.Jackson paul, Mr. jackson paul mail me tell me that you siad that i did not give you the informations on who to send the money but i the did. hear is the information to send the money to me so that i can take it to the cout so that they can give me the remaning document to me. so that i can take it to the bank for the relice of your funs in to your account. i give my words to you as soon as you make the payment today the document will be giveing to me, best regards BARRISTER GALVIN, PAYMENT INFORMATION DETAILS: THE SECRET QUESTION : THE ANSWER: SENDER'S NAME: SENDER'S ADDRESS: THE CONTROL NUMBER: RECIEVER'S NAME: RECIEVER'S ADDRESS: LAGOS NIGERIA Pedro Martinez [More background: Dale Svuem is the third base coach for the Red Sox. He is renowned for waving runners home where they are promptly thrown out. In other words, he is TERRIBLE at his job, and fans and the media are constantly calling for him to be fired. End Rant.] Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: I find it hard to believe that you are the only Barrister in Nigeria who can get this done. I will state it again. You are fired; Mr Jackson Paul and I will find a new lawyer to get this transaction done. Here' s a joke for you: Q: What's the difference between you and Dale Svuem? A: Dale Svuem hasn't been fired yet. [Poor Jackson scoured Nigeria for this barrister - he doesn't want to give up yet.] Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: TAKE MY ADVIS Dear Petey, Thanks for your mail to me.i hope this mail get to you in good state of mind. i have heard what you said but if i may ask you this Scott Boras is he a barrister hear in nigeria becoaus if he is not it can not work for us becoaus the cout hear in nigeria nose that my late claint barrister is a nigeria so i don't this your barrister Scott Boras will help us in this business way not give Barrister Galvin a cheanrs to do his work for us i truse him somuch that i can not be afread of him. so go aheard with him du what ever he said so to make thins fast for us in this business take my word of advis, thanks your friend Mr. October so go heard and make the payment to him today, Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 DEAR PETEY, HEAR IS MY PHONE NUMBER :234-8033-998471 I WILL BE WAITING FOR YOUR CALL NOW. SO I CAN TELL YOU MORE THINS, THANKS YOUR FRIEND MR. OCTOBER, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Mr. October: There is no way I am sending money to Barrister Galvin. Superagent Scott Boras isn't a Nigerian lawyer, he's a Superagent! There is nothing he can't do. My friend, are you still serious about this transaction? We are so close... but we'll never get there with Barrister Galvin. Did Superagent Scott Boras email you yet? I asked him to. -Petey [This might be the most incomprehesible email I have ever read.] Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: i shuld be the one asking you if you are serious Dear Petey, you think is porsible to live barrister galvin you don't know doing that can make us lose this tranfer pls don't late him to be agree with us pls i begg you in the name of God you need to understan me if i tell you some thing or are you derting me. see petey like you somuch that i can not get agree with you pls do this payment to the barrister Galvin so that we will not lose this money pls inthe name of God, i shuld be the one asking you if you are serious about this transaction i wose thing bye now this business morest have come to concultion this is what you will do. tell barrster Galvin that you are sorry for that becoaus he forward the mail you sent to he to me. so petey my brother pls go hear and make the payment pls no two morech ouastinos, pls my good friend call me with the number that i gave you now Thanks Mr. october Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I don't like to see you this upset, my friend! You're so upset I could hardly understand your email. Mr October, what happened to the strong confident man I started this transaction with? Now you're wheedling to an EMPLOYEE. Barrister Galvin doesn't run Nigeria. He's not a bank official. He's a lawyer. There's no way I will ever tell him I am sorry. You should know me by now - I am a vary stubborn and proud man, and I don't take well to disrespect. I left Boston because of it, and I'll probably leave New York some day because of it. So, either we get a new lawyer and you get your act together, or we part company. And Pedro holds grudges. Your friend, Petey [Meanwhile, enter the Superagent!] Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: Representation in Legal Matter Dear Jackson Paul: Mr. Pedro Martinez has contacted me regarding your lawyer difficulties. Don't worry, Superagent Scott Boras will take you as a client. My terms are simple: Whatever you earn, I will take 15% off the top. It sounds steep, but I'm worth it. I'm doing the same thing for Johnny Damon later this year. Now, we have a bank to deal with right? No problem. I've dealt with Steinbrenner. Regards, Scott Boras Superagent Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: CALL ME hi Mr. Scott Boras how are you today you are fine ? my good friend mr petey tolk somuch abou't you so i will like you to call me on my phone number:: 234-8033-998471 i have some thins to tolk with you. i will be wait to hear from you thanks [Let's try to join the scam force. I want some of Pedro's imaginary money too!] Superagent Scott Boras From: Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Jackson (or whatever your name is.): Yeah, Pedro told me all about you. He thinks you work for a bank and he is all excited about helping you with this transaction. Then again, he's not a Superagent... just a Hall of Fame pitcher. I know this is a 419 scam. But I'm not telling him. Maybe you can get him to send half the money to me and half to your guy. Let's talk. [Attempt #6 to solicit western unioned money. Again, no payment info.] Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: DO THIS URGENTLY TODAY Dear petey, thanks for your mail to me. am sorry if i have tolk to you in a bad way, this is what you are going to do. send the money to me so that i can take it to barrister galvin my self so that he will lesting to me urgently and get the document reed and take it to the bank for us.i will begg him my self if you know what i am tring to avoid you will understand me. what i mean by leting him work, 1,i have tell him every thing about the business so i don't wan't him to desipoint us in this transfer. and you know that no one nose about this business of transartion except only the barrister and he head unredy geting two of the document. so by leting him go he ma lick this to eney of his friend and he can go heard to the bank and presient his friend as the next of kin to my late claint, but trust me i will go now and tell him that i will bring the money for him,so as soon as you send the money to me i will take it to him my self, pls no delay will have to act fast on this now, so i will go now and tell him that you have send the money to me that i will bring it for him tomorrow, Thanks as i wait your urgent reply, yours friend Mr.October ................................................................................. PAYMENT INFORMATOINS DETAILS 1,SEND NAME AND ADDRESS: 2,QUESTION:PETEY 3,ANSWER:OCTOBER 4,CONTROL NUMBER: SEND IT THOURG WESTAN UNION MONEY TRANSFER LAGOS NIGERIA, THANKS AS I WAIT YOUR PAYMENT DETAILS MR.OCTOBER, [Pedro NEVER puts up with disrespect or bullshit.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Mr. Jackson Paul I would advise you not to speak to me in this tone. I have told you repeatedly that Barrister Galvin will NEVER get $1500 from me. Never. Ever. The Cubs will win the World Series before that happens. -Pedro Jackson Paul Date: Aug 25, 2005 Subject: CONTACT THIS BARRISTER NOW Dear Petey, thants 4 the mail u sent to me? I have just finish speaking with one BAR.MUSA MOHAMMED concerning this transaction and he promised to help us.As a cheif barristerin IN cherge of nieria federal high court of justice,he said, all documents will be ready in a day.he said also that he is not going to cherge us now untill he got all documents from us.This is his mail address:brristermusamohammed@kmohammed.zzn.com contact him now and tell him the names of the documents u need, And he Also said that his consultant fees is $1;300 only for all the documents we need for the money to be transfer to ur account in 24hours, that he will represent u in the bank tomorrow if u made the payment today.so contact him now and get back to me. so that i will know how far, and i have giving him your email address,so that if you contact him he will know that is you, thank God that we have goting the bast barrister in tan. I know you will like him if he work well for us. i will tell barrister Galvin that he hould not worry abou't this eney more. Thanks yours friend Mr.October, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 25, 2005 Dear Mr. October: Finally you listened to your old buddy Pedro. You fired that jerk. I'm so happy! But before we hire a new incompetent lawyer, why don't we give Superagent Scott Boras a try? We tried yours, now lets try mine. If he makes a mess of things like he did for poor Derek Lowe, then we can use Musa Mohammed. I'll tell Scott to send you an email. Your friend, Petey Jackson Paul To: Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 26, 2005 Subject: CALL ME Dear Scott, Thanks for your mail to me, I don't understan what you are tolking about, pls can you call me with my phone number:234-8033-998471 or give me your nuber so that we can tolk,urgently delay is dagarus this is not scam ok, thanks mr jackson paul, Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 26, 2005 Jackson: It's a scam. There's no money, you're in an internet cafe in Nigeria, there's no barrister, your name is not Jackson Paul. Pedro is a mugu. I have been talking to him and he won't go with your new attorney. Think of some way to get me half the money, and I'll convince him to send it to you. $700 for you is better than nothing. This is how Superagents get things done. We make deals. Scott Boras Superagent Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 26, 2005 You dumb shit. Pedro is getting ready to send you the money, and you tell him to cut things off with me? Listen my mugu friend, you cut me in or I pull the plug on Pedro. I have more influence on him than you do. Scott Boras Superagent [I guess Jackson doesn't need a superagent.] Jackson Paul To: Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 26, 2005 hi scott you can go to hell, Superagent Scott Boras Date: Aug 26, 2005 I can go to hell? My mugu 419 scam artist friend, I'm not the one sitting in an internet cafe trying to beg, whine and demand money from people. Hell has a special place for 419 scammers. Oh wait, I forgot - you're ENTITLED to it for some wrongdoing. Get a real job. Scott Boras Superagent Jackson Paul Date: Aug 26, 2005 Subject: CONTACT THIS BARRISTER NOW DEAR PETEY, THANS FOR THE MAIL YOU SEND TO ME, I HAVE TOLD YOU THERE IS KNOW TIME FOR US TO DELAY, GO HEARD AND CONTACT THE BARRISTER MUSA PLS. YOU ARE TAKEING THIS BUSINESS FORGRANTED AND ALSO TAKEING MY WORDS FORGRANTED, YOU KNOW THAT BARRISTER GALVIN IS AWER OF THIS BUSINESS SO WILL NEED TO ACT FAST WITH THIS BARRISTER MUSA BECOAUS HE IS THE CHEF BARRISTER IN LAGOS STATE HE HIS A WELL KNOW MAN, SA SOON AS YOU GET THIS MAIL PLS CONTACT HIM, BECOAUS KNOW HE WILL BE WAITING FOR YOU TO CONTACT HIM, AND HAS PROMISS TO GET THE DOCUMENT FOR US TODAY SO WAY ARE SO INTRESTED IN THIS YOUR BARRISTER WHO IS TRING TO MAKE FULL OF ME TOLKING TRASH, LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE NOT INTRESTED IN THIS BUSINESS SO THAT I CAN LOOK FOR SOMEONE ELSE, THANKS, YOURS FRIEND MR.OCTOBER [I thought I fired this guy! The best part - he gave me the death certificate anyway. But if you remember from the original email, his client is Engr. E. Wayne. The death certificate is for Engr. Henry Smith. How many engineers must die before we put an end to tsunamis???] Barrister Galvin Date: Aug 26, 2005 Subject: VIEW THE CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT DEAR PEDRO, HOW ARE YOU TODAY? THIS IS THE COPY OF DEATH CERTIFICATE THAT I HAVE COLLETED FROM THE COUT OF JUSTICE OF NIGERIA, LET ME TELL YOU THIS IS TO SHOW MY INNOCENT TO YOU INTHIS BUSINESS AND I WILL LIKE YOU VIEW IT AND GET BACK TO ME, SO THAT I CAN CONTINUE THE JOB FOR YOU I PROMISE TO GIVE YOU THE BEST IN THIS TRANSCATION, I STILL I HAVE THE OTHER ONE WITH ME. I JUST WAN'T YOU TO VIEW THIS, SO THAT YOU WILL KNOW HOW SERIOUS ABOUT THIS JOB OF YOURS ALL I NEED FROM YOU IS YOUR GO AHEARD SO THAT I CAN GO AND GET THE OTHER DOCUMENT THAT I WILL PRESENT TO THE BANK FOR YOUR TRANSFER OF YOUR FUNDS, THANKS MR BARRISTER GALVIN, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 26, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I have been told by Superagent Scott Boras that you are thinking about including him as a partner! That is great. He is so good at what he does - he got Varitek a sweet contract! Superagent Scott Boras told me not to send any money to Barrister Musa until you and he work out some details. I think you're going to love working with him! Your friend, Petey [This was directed to Barrister Galvin but poor Jackson thought I meant it to him! Poor little buddy of mine.] Pedro Martinez Cc: jackson_paul_2005@yahoo.co.uk Date: Aug 26, 2005 Dear Barrister Galvin: Mr. Jackson Paul's late client is not named Engr. Henry Smith. His name was Engr. E. WAYNE! You are so INCOMPETENT you have the WRONG DEAD ENGINEER! I'm so glad we FIRED you. We have a new Barrister. And we are also working with Superagent Scott Boras. Neither of our new guys would send me the death certificate of the wrong guy! PLEASE DON'T CONTACT ME AGAIN Best regards, Pedro Martinez Jackson Paul Date: Aug 26, 2005 Subject: VIEW THE CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT DEAR PETEY, WHAT IS THIS THAT YOU SEND TO ME, ARE YOU TELING ME NOT TO CONTACT YOU AGAN. OR WHAT DU YOU MEAN, AND TELL YOUR BARRISTER SCOTT NOT TO CONTACT ME AGEAN,IF YOU CAN NOT GO ON WHAT BARRISTER MUSA,THEN FORGET ABOUT THIS BUSINESS, THANKS YOUR FRIEND MR OCTOBER, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 26, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I was telling Barrister Galvin not to contact me again and copying you on the message so that you would know! We fired him and he's still trying to work with us. Also, he proved how DUMB he is by sending a death certificate with the name Engr. Henry Smith. Your client's name was Engr. E. WAYNE! What happened with Superagent Scott Boras??? Why can't we work with him? Your friend, Petey [Way to throw Barrister Galvin under the bus, Jackson.] Jackson Paul Date: Aug 26, 2005 Subject: HAVE YOU CONTACT BARRISTER MUSA Dear Petey, thanks for the mail you send to me,? I have told you to stop lesting to barrister Galvin he is a lieyer, so go on with barrister musa mohammed.have you contact him toady, pls tell me what he said and howfar.and how long it will take us to get the money transfer to your account, you are delaying this business pls make it fast so that i can starte coming over to your country for the shearing of the money, thanks yours friend, Mr. october Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 26, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I will definitely stop listening to Barrister Galvin. That's basically why I told him never to email me again. I will contact Barrister Musa Mohammed as soon as I hear back from Superagent Scott Boras. I hope we are finally back on track with this thing. I feel like I'm in the 18th inning in Tampa Bay. Your friend, Petey [He might be getting tired of me.] Jackson Paul Date: Aug 26, 2005 Dear petey, OK, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 26, 2005 Subject: ARE YOU SCAMMING ME??? Dear Mr. October: I just got a very disturbing letter from Superagent Scott Boras... he tells me that you are running some kind of SCAM and there is no Engr. E. WAYNE! He says you just were going to take my $1500 and run. Is this so? Your friend, Petey Jackson Paul Date: Aug 27, 2005 Subject: YOU ARE NOT SERIOUS IN THIS BUSINESS DEAR PETEY, THANKS FOR THE MAIL YOU SEND TO ME? WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM ARE YOU CALING ME A SCAMER, OR WHAT ARE YOU TRING TO SAE, I KNOW THAT YOUR FRIEND SCOTT IS A THEIF HE WAN'TS TO EAT WHAT HE DID NOT SOUR, IF YOU ARE NOT INTRESTED IN THIS BUSINESS PLS LET ME KNOW,SO THAT I CAN LOOK FOR SOMEONE ELSS, THANKS YOUR FRIEND MR.OCTOBER, [I'm tired of Jackson. Let's see if I can get a photo.] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 29, 2005 Dear Mr. October: I am not calling you a scammer! I am confused, as Superagent Scott Boras has given me some information about scams coming out of Nigeria that are very similar to what's happening here! As for Superagent Scott Boras being, as you put in such a literate way, "A THEIF HE WAN'TS TO EAT WHAT HE DID NOT SOUR", you hit the ball on the seams with that one! How do you think he got where he is??? I want to continue this, but I'm a little uncertain. Perhaps there is some form of proof you could send me? Oh wait, I know! Send me a photo of yourself holding a sign that says "Mr. October"! That would be fantastic! Your friend, Petey [He's really losing interest. First screwing up my nickname... what's next?] Jackson Paul Date: Aug 30, 2005 Subject: YOU ARE NOT SERIOUS IN THIS BUSINESS Dear Tepey, THANKS FOR THE YOU SEND TO ME,AND HOW ARE YOU TODAY, I OHPE THIS GET TO YOU IN GOOD STATE OF MIND, WHAT IS THE MEAN OF THIS YOU STILL DON'T BELIVE ME SO WY DON'T YOU QUIT AND FORGET ABOUT THIS BUSINESS AND LET ME LOOK FOR SOWONE TO TRANSFER THIS MONEY TO HIS ACCOUNT, BUT TO MAKE THING FAST IF YOU STILL INTRESTERD YOU CAN COME ON MY PHONE NUMBER:234-8027755129 SO WE CAN TALK THING OVER, YOU KNOW THERE IS NO TIME FOR US TO DELAY IN THIS TRANSFER THE BANK MA THINK THAT YOU ARE NOT THE REAL BROTHER TO MY LATE CLEINT, PLS IF YOU SERIOUS,CALL ME NOW AS SOON AS THIS MAIL GET TO YOU, THANKS FOR CO-PRATION MR. OCTOBER, Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 30, 2005 Dear Mr. October: Why are you calling me Tepey? I thought we agreed my nickname was Petey. If you can't even remember my nickname, then how can I trust you in this transaction??? Listen, I am still interested in tricking the bank into thinking I am the brother of a white guy. It wouldn't be the first time two people who looked nothing alike were accepted as brothers. Look at Vincent and Julius! I want to continue, but there needs to be TRUST. First you fuck up my nickname, then you spout all this jibber-jabber. You make a symbolic gesture. Like when someone is hitting you all day, so you drill him in the ass. Please send me a picture of you holding a sign that says "Mr. October". Then I will know I can trust you and we can finish up this business. By the way, for someone so worried about delays, maybe you shouldn't have wandered all over town finding the shittiest barrister you could. Usted aspira los huevos, PETEY (not Tepey) Jackson Paul Date: Aug 30, 2005 Subject: PLS CALL ME Dear Petey, thanks for your mail to me,foer the mistake i am so worry that is way pls can you give me your number agan so that i can call you now i will be wait for your phone number: Thank Mr.october, [The spanish below is the babelfish translation for "You eat farts." Yes, I know it's juvenile and not proper spanish, and babelfish won't even translate the word FART into Spanish... oh well! Until next time!] Pedro Martinez Date: Aug 30, 2005 Dear Mr. October: It's hard for me to forgive people, but I will give you a chance. I still haven't forgiven old Gerald "Ice" Williams for charging me in 99, and wrecking my no hitter in 05. How many Cy Youngs do I have left in me? I'm not a young man anymore, Mr. October. You can call me at 206.xxx.xxxx I still want to move forward, so I need a token of TRUST from you. Basically I won't settle for anything less than a picture of you holding a sign that says "Mr. October". Just ask Theo Epstein how likely I am to settle for less than I want. If you can't do the picture, then I question how seriously I can trust you. Usted apesta como farts, Petey |