LADS COME TO DUNCE INANE

updated june 8

The Lads get a dose of the Bard.

Starring:
the scammer(s):
MURPHY BELLO

the good guy(s):
THE THANE OF CAWDOR

MURPHY BELLO

FROM THE DESK OF: MURPHY BELLO

MANAGER CREDIT AND FOREIGN BILLS.
UNION BANK PLC. dr_murphy_bello@ny.com
Attn: Sir
My name is Bello Ali the manager, credit and foreign bills of Union Bank Nigeria Plc. I am writing in respect of a foreign customer of my bank with account number 14-255-2004/utb/t who perished in a plane crash Korean Air Flight 801] with the whhome to claim his funds of USD$.30 m, [Thirty million United States dollars] which has been with my branch for a very long time. On this note, I decided to seek for a foreigner who I can present as the next of kin hence no one has come up to be the next of kin.
And the banking ethics here does not allow such money to stay more Than Eight years, after which the money will be called into the bank treasury as unclaimed funds after this period. In view of this I got your contact from a business contact enquiry. Note that you do not need to have similar names with the late beneficiary. I will give you 25% of the total. Upon the receipt of your response, I will commence on manipulating your information into the file as the next of kin and I will send you information on how we intend to actualize our objective in a legal manner.
I will not fail to bring to your notice that this business is hitch free and that you should not entertain any fear as all modalities for fund transfer can be finalized within five banking days, after your claim is established as the certified next of kin to the deceased.
When you receive this letter. Kindly, send me your private Tel/Fax Numbers thruogh my private emaill address at dr_murphy_bello@ny.com for quick communication
Awaiting your favorable response.
Yours truly,
Murphy Bello

[Dear readers, this is of course your basic Dead Bank Customer letter.]


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
To: dr_murphy_bello@ny.com
Date: 22 May 2004, 01:58:49 PM

Dear Mr Bello

I am very interested as to how you came by this address, and feel perhaps this message was intended for someone else? We live in Scotland and are expecting some important guests soon, which is why this note is necessarily rather abrupt.You should know of your misdirected mail at once as my wife and I think would be a real tragedy if you found no one to help you.

Thaneof

Thaneof Cawdor
3 Wiches Cauldron
King Duncan Street
Nr. Birnham Wood
Miracskyshire
ENGLAND
UR1 GIT


MURPHY BELLO

Date: 24 May 2004 10:32:20 -0000

Dear Thaneof Cawdor,

Thanks for your urgent response to my mail and all your explanations and interest to assist me conclude this transaction. I would like you to have it in mind
that I have perfected all arrangements for the urgent approval and smooth transfer of the fund into any bank account that you might provide. Also you should not be afraid of any governmental authority (ies) regarding this money transfer because all documents that are going to cover you up in this transaction must be secured to back up the claim.
I would like to know if your bank account is capable enough to receive the amount of money involved in this transaction without raising any eyebrow.
Before we proceed, could you please tell me little about yourself? Your job, your age, marital status and what you feel we can invest this money into after successful conclusion of this transaction.
Additionally, note that I am 52, have 4 kids (3 boys and 1 girl), my wife is late since 2 years now. Send to me immediately the following information: 1. Your complete names and address as they should appear in all documents. 2. Your bank account number and the bank details.
Upon the receipt of the above-required information, we are going to contract the services of an attorney here who is going to secure all necessary documents and also represent you here. I soon as I hear from you I will send you the contact details of the lawyer.
I am waiting for your immediate response and phone call on my direct phone number: 234-803-3271583.

Regards,
MURPHY BELLO ALI
TEL: 234-8033271583


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 24 May 2004, 12:48:08 PM

My dear Dr Bello

I am glad that you got my message and am still not sure that it was originally intended for me. My wife and I are landowners with some expectations in Scotland, and this all seems very odd and out of our way.

I am 45 and my wife Quims is 43. We unfortunately do not have any children something which I envy you for, only my wife's dog, Spot. (Sorry for the brevity of this message but he has been rather a nuisance while I am typing this message incidentally and she has been telling the damn animal to get out). My bank is an Italian branch based here in Miracskyshire. I must admit I am hesitating about telling you more until I feel reassured in this matter.

Best regards

Thaneof Cawdor
3 Wiches Cauldron
King Duncan Street
Nr. Birnham Wood
Miracskyshire
ENGLAND
UR1 GIT

Then a seemingly identical message, but with a different contact:


MURPHY BELLO

Date: 24 May 2004 10:30:32 -0000

Dear Thaneof Cawdor,

Thanks for your urgent response to my mail and all your explanations and interest to assist me conclude this transaction. I would like you to have it in mind that I have perfected all arrangements for the urgent

BLAH BLAH BLAH

Regards,
MURPHY BELLO ALI
TEL: 234-8033271583

eihekwaba@yahoo.com

Oh dear the poor fellow seems to have account problems. Noting a second address at the foot of the first of two otherwise identical messages he sent I have tried again just in case.. after all, if it were done tis better it were done quickly..


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
My dear Dr Bello

I am glad that you got my message and am still not sure that it was originally intended for me. My wife and I are landowners with some expectations in Scotland, and this all seems very odd and out of our way.

I am 45 and my wife Quims is 43. etc. etc.

PS Your first e-mail address seems to have been disabled, is there a problem?


MURPHY BELLO

From: "murphy bello ali" <meali@elvis.com>
Subject: Very sorry.
Date: Tue, 25 May 2004 02:13:41 -0700 (PDT)

Dear Thaneof Cawdor,

I am very sorry to inform you that I have changed my email account to this meali@elvis.com to avoid some unwanted persons to know what exactly we are doing.

Please, I would want you to send to me my first mail to you regarding this transaction to reassure me that you are the real Thaneof Cawdor. I will then explain more to you on the way forward in this transaction.

I am waiting for your quick reply.

Please, you should not call me again at the number I gave to you as it has been given to another staff here.

I will furnish you with my new phone number as soon as I here from you.

Thank you for your co-operation.

Regards,
MURPHY BELLO ALI

Am I the real-false or the real-real Thane Of Cawdor?


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
My dear Dr Bello

Here is the original message and hope this will suffice to prove I am genuine. I am sorry to hear of your problems. To tell the truth, my wife wants to wash her hands of the whole affair but I am keen to make a stab at it.

[he then includes an earlier message ("Thanks for your urgent response to my mail")]


MURPHY BELLO

From: "murphy bello ali" <meali@elvis.com>
Date: Tue, 25 May 2004 05:51:48 -0700 (PDT)

Dear Thaneof,

Can I have your telephone number to call you immediately so that we can talk.

You did not send my first and original proposal. Please kindly send it to me now including your telephone number.

I am waiting for it now.

Bello Ali.

Just wait until I give details of my Banquo account...


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 25 May 2004, 11:17:53 AM

Dear Dr Bello

I am surprised that you have not kept a copy of your own business correspondence, as I am very careful to retain everything, especially something of this importance. Fortunately I keep copies of everything: double double, less toil and trouble, which is always said here. Anyhow, I have pasted it at the end of this message.

My wife has asked me not to give out our phone number just at the moment as we are both still a bit wary, and so please be patient while we try and come to terms with the enormity of this business. What else can you do to reassure us that this matter will be legal and honest?

I wait to hear from you.

Regards

Thaneof Cawdor


MURPHY BELLO

Date: Wed, 26 May 2004 03:25:31 -0700 (PDT)

Dear Thaneof,

Please I just want to be sure that you are the same person that you say you are and not that I am not keeping my documents well.

Please kindly let me know what you need to know that am honest and the transaction legal. I will surely give you and explain further for you.

Bello.


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 26 May 2004, 12:31:32 PM

Dear Mr Bello

I attached the copy you requested at the bottom of my last mailing, did you not see it?

Thank you for the reassurance and I think I am happy to proceed. My wife is less keen but I am hoping to talk her round and I need her consent before I can go ahead. Unfortunately Quims has a weakness for the drink and it is hard to predict her moods. I was seated in the bar area tonight, contemplating the pace of developments, a print out of your original message before me, when she walked in and noticed I had a glass half full of my favourite cocktail. Before I knew it she said 'Is this a dacquiri that I see before me?' and then drank it! I would not normally share this information with strangers, but I want you to know I am entirely honest with you and the difficulties I am facing.

What can you say to reassure her?

T


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 04 Jun 2004, 01:45:37 AM

My dear Mr Bello

My wife and I are now back from our short break at McSmegaroon and are concerned that we have heard no more from you. It may well be that you have found another helping hand and if so we hope that you get what you deserve in this business.

In the meantime, we have decided to pass along our phone number and fax number so that you can call us to show our sincerity in this matter.

Tel : 44 (0) 1350 727462
Fax : 44 (0) 1350 728979

Be sure to ask for my by name and I will come to the phone at once. After all, if it were done, (when it is done), then its well it is were done quickly.

I have taken the liberty of enquiring at the Banquo Scotland re the exchange of funds situation and they seem to think it should prove little problem.

Best wishes

Thaneof Cawdor

s
MURPHY BELLO

Subject: Thank you for tel/fax numbers.
Date: Fri, 04 Jun 2004 02:27:03 -0700 (PDT)

Dear Sir,

I have been waiting for your information which I requested from you and not that I found another person. I am still ready to do this business with you as you have shown me that you can handle same for me.

Please could send to me your mailing address so as to enable my lawyer draft an agreement for us and to quickly start processing the necessary documents in your name as the next of kin and funds beneficiary.

I am waiting for this information and the lawyer will surely contact you today and I will also call you as planned before you sent the numbers. Thank you for the numbers and please expect my call today and hope you send the mailing address so that I can also forward same to the lawyer.

Thank you for your co-operation in this matter.

Bello Ali M.


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 04 Jun 2004, 03:03:27 AM

My dear Mr Bello

We are all very excited about matters now here at the ranch. You may send all your documention to the address given at the end of this message. We hope your lawyer calls us promptly as we are going out soon. My wife unfortunately is not feeling very well and we are consulting a specialist. To be frank she has something of a compulsive cleaning disorder, constantly wringing her hands and so forth, and it has been a real worry but I am determined not to let this prove a distraction.

However rest assured that we do want to hear from your or your representative. If we are not here therefore please ask him to speak to my son Tossof.

Best wishes

Thaneof


MURPHY BELLO

Date: Fri, 04 Jun 2004 06:16:21 -0700 (PDT)

Dear Sir,

The number you gave me to call you was not right as someone said that there is no such name there. What is going on here. I was also told that the place is just a hotel or a ranch. Please kindly confirm your number so that we can talk.

Bello Ali M.


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 04 Jun 2004, 07:14:32 AM

Mr Bello

Yes this correct; I am staying in this hotel for a few days for the grouse shooting season, sorry for the confusion I should have briefed the staff and given you all the details. Please redial and ask clearly and distinctly for Thaneof Cawdor, as sometimes the staff do not understand thick native accents. We are in room 419, registered in the of Isa Dyldo.

Failing this, give me your number and either myself or (if I am out on the moor) Tossof will call you back at once. I am worried now that you are not entirely serious in this matter- after all this is not child's play my friend! In fact, last night I hardly had any rest and had to use a local bed quilt called a MacDuff to keep myself comfortable. It was not until I thought to lay on MacDuff that I had an easy night of it. This is turning into a right old drama.

Please call as soon as you can.


MURPHY BELLO

Date: Fri, 04 Jun 2004 08:30:16 -0700 (PDT)

Hello Mr TC isah,

I will call at your popular room 419 and hopefully I will be serious about the transaction in rm 419


THE THANE OF CAWDOR
Date: 04 Jun 2004, 09:04:00 AM

My dear Mr Bello

It is hard to make sense of this message. Have you been drinking? I know it can be a problem amongst mugu crooks like yourself.

Those many others, who have also been enjoying each update of your inept attempts at a scam, posted on a website for the entertainment of all, will be most concerned.

Thaneof Cawdor
3 Wiches Cauldron
King Duncan Street
Nr. Birnham Wood
Miracskyshire
ENGLAND
UR1 GIT



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